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Fade To Black
I sat on the bench and gazed up at the stars. The night sky gave me comfort. It was a sense of escape from my own reality my own problems. My realitionship had recently ended and I was looking for a way to vent all of my stress. I wanted to be alone. At least thats what i thought I wanted. I wanted to Fade to black to nothingness and to just make my life easier. I wanted to get away from school away from family away from my life in general. I saw no way out the door was locked so I had to make my own back door in my situation. I used Hate to my advantage I started to think about all the wrongs done to me and started to Hate people started to drop people abandon people to make me feel better. It helped to have people out of my life because the stress was gone. But i couldn't cut everyone out there were people dear to me i had to keep or I would lose all sanity in the darkness I had created. "You really like the night huh Kid?" My thoughts jerked back in my head and my soul snapped back in my chest It was Briana an old friend of mine she gave me a hug and sat next to me on the bench. "It soothes me my favorite part of the day is in fact night I said." "Figures I always thought of you as a loner you know?" "You always seemed to distance yourself from the rest of us in school, she said" Yea I know i didn't feel like i should attach myself to people I had no intention on being around in 5 years." I said, "But how would you know something like that? " Because I observe thats why I'm so quiet I learn from everyone and I've learned from you as well. "Oh really," she smiled "Well what have you learned from me Kid?" I've learned to trust only those who can trust you. I gazed into the darkness hoping to paint a picture in my mind of what my future would be like now. I saw only darkness and that was probably my answer. "Yea I hear you Kid but I trust you." I turned to look at her. "Is that so?" I smirked. "Yea so trust me and let me into your life please." As beautiful as she was i hesitated. "I can't Bree it hurts to let people in It's better if I'm alone these days. I saw tears start to form in her eyes. "No Kid I'm not trying to hurt you I have never tryed to hurt you. "If you Hate me and everyone else I understand that much but I never could really talk to you in school because we belonged to diffrent groups." "That means nothing now school is over is it not?" I said "I longed for an escape and now I have it here in the night by myself in this darkness, I am unknown I am alone how i wished it would be." "No that's wrong Kid your not alone because I'm here with you I wanted to always be here with you but we were diffrent at the time and then you got with Marie after school was out and I lost that opertunity completely, but I'm not gonna lose it again I never told you this but I really do like you Kid." Don't say what you don't mean Bree if you liked me the group thing wouldn't have mattered. If we were so diffrent then what makes us so similar now? Why wait till I try and shut everyone out to be the one to try and open back the door? I didn't know where these feelings were coming from they just kept coming up from my chest like vomit. "Please Kid hear me out on this I know i was wrong back then but people change with time and I realized I made a mistake when i wasn't there for you when Niece shut you out." My eyes got wide she had hit a vital point in my heart. One of the biggest holes in my soul that was yet to be filled came from Niece we were never together but i had wished it could be like that in the future. We were best friends I had faded to Black and she descended to light we grew apart after High School I didn't want to but I couldn't stop it.She went on with her boyfriend and it seemed that he didn't like the idea of his girl being so close to another guy. The rest is in the back of my mind to hard to bring up. One of the reasons I chose to Fade away was because of this not entirely because of this but in part. " Don't talk about her around me please" I said sadly".

"Kid Listen to me you don't have to shut me out I want to be here for you." "I want to make things alot easier on you, but you have to trust me you have to open that door enough for me to come in with you." "You can shut it and lock it with a key after I'm in as long as I'm in there with you." I'm no one Bree I'm only a star in the sky i said looking back up at them. "I don't stand out I'm not special and there are a million other stars just like me." "I'm just a part of something much greater." I said "I try to make myself stand out from everyone else but when theres always a million other stars that want to take your shine you understand?" That's when you just give up hope of becoming something greater than what you are and deal with what you have." "If everyones always talking about the big dipper or the North Star what makes me stand a chance against them?" "You just grow to become Jealous of the North Star because he's getting everything you long for you know?" "You start to think would anyone even recognize if you were even in the sky anymore because you were just like every other star." "You know though there would be an uproar if The North Star somehow dissapeared and it hurts you more."

"I think your somebody though Kid." "You have always been someone to me and even though you may have not noticed me that much in school i noticed you." You and Niece were so close i couldnt get in the way of you two even though you werent together it would have felt awkward. You know she didn't really like anyone outside your group hell she didnt even like some people in your group." It was you and her and I'm sorry for bringing her up again but it's the truth I know how close you 2 were, and its messed up how it ended between yall but don't let it define you Kid." "It doesn't I said getting up nothing does." I turned and walked away.....



To be continued

sad man ur writing always makes me get so emotional ...
i can't wait to read the rest ...
but why are ur stories always so sad?
do u feel like ur character "kid" does?
if u do, then i am ur "Bree" ...

crying , dont ask why im crying. it was so... so... so... crying