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 Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 11:33 pm
Im bored so I thought I would start this. Like always the creator always goes first.
From the movie Beavis and Butt-Head Do America
David Van Driessen: There is a wonderful and exiting world out there and you will soon realise that we dont need TV to entertain us.
Butt-Head: *usual laugh* He said a**s...
David Van Driessen: *sighs* Were you boys listening to a single word I was saying?
Butt-Head: Yeah...a**s...*both Beavis and Butt-Head then start to laugh*
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 1:46 pm
OMG! I have like a gazillion...xD Well not a gazillion, but a few...<<
So I'll just tell you my favorite <3
Little Miss Sunshine <--Greatest Freaking Movie Eva...xD
Olive: I'd like to dedicate this to my grandpa, who showed me these moves.
Pageant MC: Aww, that is so sweet.
~*Audience applauds*~
Pageant MC: Is he here? Where's your grandpa right now?
Olive: In the trunk of our car.
There's like a gazillion amazing quotes from that movie, but that's my favorite...xD I dunno, That part struck me funny...xD
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 1:59 pm
From the movie Serenity (which i haven't seen yet...but still it was in the trailer!)
Hoban 'Wash' Washburn: This landing is gonna get pretty interesting.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Define "interesting".
Hoban 'Wash' Washburn: [deadpan] Oh God, oh God, we're all going to die?
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: [on the ship's intercom] This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then - explode.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Dear Buddha, please bring me a pony and a plastic rocket...
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 2:16 pm
((That quote seems like it would be a quote from you...xD))
Ha! I just remembered this quite like 2 seconds ago so I came to post it
The Benchwarmers
"We're having macoroni for dinner tonight... that means garlic bread... YUSH!xD" --- Clark
ha ha... I love that quote...<3 Ish quoted everytime we have garlic bread or macoroni
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 2:22 pm
Very well Ren, we shall duke it out to see who has the greater movie quote thingy...
BAT THUMB
Bank customer: Hi, I'd like to make a deposit.
Female bank worker: [gasps in disgust and slaps him]
Bank customer: [holds up money] Money. I'd like to deposit money
Female bank worker: [gasps in disgust and slaps him]
Bank customer: In your bank! I'd like to deposit money in your bank.
Female bank worker: [gasps in disgust, slaps and knocks him out]
No face: Ah, you remember well Bat dung
Bat Thumb: No face!
Blue Jay: I'll have you know, that the correct term for bat dung is 'Guano' so if you insist on calling him that then you should just call him Guano!
Bat Thumb: Okay remember the be quiet part?
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 2:39 pm
O:
Fine! It's on then!
Napoleon Dynamite <---Another amazing movie...<3
Random Generic Kid: So what are you going to do today Napoleon
Napoleon: I'll do whatever I feel like I wanna do... gosh...Dx
*Five seconds later her takes out an action figure and throws it out the window of the bus.... It made no sense... but it was funneh xD*
((It's obvious that I <3 Jon Heder))
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 2:51 pm
Just Visiting
[after eating dog food]
André le Pate: I am eating this very good meats and vegetables in a very fine sauce... I will s**t easy tomorrow.
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 2:55 pm
Epic Movie
Susan: [Lucy is cleaning a doorknob] What are you doing?
Lucy: Willy told me he wanted his knob polished.
Susan: Dumbass.
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 9:21 pm
These two are both from Team America: World Police
[Gary is drinking his depression away]
Gary Johnston: I'm a d**k!
Drunk guy: Well, being a d**k ain't so bad. See, there's three kinds of people: dicks, pussies, and assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along, and dicks just wanna ******** all the time without thinking it through. But then you got your assholes, Chuck. And all the assholes want is to s**t all over everything! So, pussies may get mad at dicks once in a while, because... pussies get ******** by dicks. But dicks ********, Chuck. And if they didn't ******** the assholes, you know what you'd get? You'd get your d**k and your p***y all covered in s**t!
[Gary pukes]
Gary Johnston: Oh, no, we are'nt! We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild... are pussies. And Kim Jong Il... is an a*****e. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get ******** by dicks. But dicks - also - ******** - assholes... assholes who just wanna s**t on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can ******** an a*****e... is a d**k... with some balls. The problem with dicks is, sometimes they ******** too much or ******** when it isn't appropriate......and it takes a p***y to show 'em that. But sometimes, pussies get so full of s**t that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are only an inch and half away from assholes. I don't know much in this crazy, crazy world, but I do know: If you don't let us ******** - this - a*****e, we're going to have our dicks and our pussies all covered in s**t!
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Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 12:25 am
Dodgeball the Movie
Lance Armstrong: Hey, aren't you Peter La Fleur?
Peter La Fleur: Lance Armstrong!
Lance Armstrong: Ya, that's me. But I'm a big fan of yours.
Peter La Fleur: Really?
Lance Armstrong: Ya, I've been watching the dodgeball tournament on the Ocho. ESPN 8. I just can't get enough of it. Good luck in the tournament. I'm really pulling for you against those jerks from Globo Gym. I think you better hurry up or you're gonna be late.
Peter La Fleur: Uh, actually I decided to quit... Lance.
Lance Armstrong: Quit? You know, once I was thinking of quitting when I was diagnosed with brain, lung and testicular cancer all at the same time. But with the love and support of my friends and family, I got back on the bike and won the Tour de France five times in a row. But I'm sure you have a good reason to quit. So what are you dying of that's keeping you from the finals?
Peter La Fleur: Right now it feels a little bit like... shame.
Lance Armstrong: Well, I guess if a person never quit when the going got tough, they wouldn't anything to regret for the rest of their life. Well good luck to you Peter. I'm sure this decision won't haunt you forever.
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Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 1:59 pm
Forrest Gump <--- <3
Forrest: (voice-over) Now, when I was a baby, Momma named me after the great Civil War hero, General Nathan Bedford Forrest... She said we was related to him in some way. And, what he did was, he started up this club called the Ku Klux Klan. They'd all dress up in their robes and their bedsheets and act like a bunch of ghosts or spooks or something. They'd even put bedsheets on their horses and ride around. And anyway, that's how I got my name. Forrest Gump. Momma said that the Forrest part was to remind me that sometimes we all do things that, well, just don't make no sense.
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Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 10:04 pm
V for Vendetta.
V: [Evey pulls out her mace] I can assure you I mean you no harm.
Evey Hammond: Who are you?
V: Who? Who is but the form following the function of what and what I am is a man in a mask.
Evey Hammond: Well I can see that.
V: Of course you can. I'm not questioning your powers of observation I'm merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is.
Evey Hammond: Oh. Right.
V: But on this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace sobriquet, to suggest the character of this dramatis persona.
V: Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition.
[carves V into poster on wall]
V: The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.
[giggles]
V: Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.
Evey Hammond: Are you like a crazy person?
V: I am quite sure they will say so. But to whom, might I ask, am I speaking with?
Evey Hammond: I'm Evey.
V: Evey? E-V. Of course you are.
Evey Hammond: What does that mean?
V: It means that I, like God, do not play with dice and I don't believe in coincidences.
The amount of V words is amazing
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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 2:41 pm
The Producers
Franz Liebkind: Stand still! How can I shoot you if you keep moving!
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Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 3:04 pm
Monty Python
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Who goes there?
King Arthur: It is I, Arthur, son of Uther Pendragon, from the castle of Camelot. King of the Britons, defeater of the Saxons, Sovereign of all England!
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Pull the other one!
King Arthur: I am, and this is my trusty servant Patsy. We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join me in my court at Camelot. I must speak with your lord and master.
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: What? Ridden on a horse?
King Arthur: Yes!
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: You're using coconuts!
King Arthur: What?
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin' 'em together.
King Arthur: So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land, through the kingdom of Mercia, through...
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Where'd you get the coconuts?
King Arthur: We found them.
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Found them? In Mercia? The coconut's tropical!
King Arthur: What do you mean?
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Well, this is a temperate zone
King Arthur: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land?
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
King Arthur: Not at all. They could be carried.
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: What? A swallow carrying a coconut?
King Arthur: It could grip it by the husk!
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut.
King Arthur: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here?
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right?
King Arthur: Please!
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Am I right?
The Witch: I'm not a witch I'm not a witch!
Sir Bedevere: But you are dressed as one
The Witch: *They* dressed me up like this!
Crowd: We didn't! We didn't...
The Witch: And this isn't my nose. It's a false one.
Sir Bedevere: [lifts up her false nose] Well?
Peasant 1: Well, we did do the nose.
Sir Bedevere: The nose?
Peasant 1: And the hat, but she is a witch!
Crowd: Yeah! Burn her! Burn her!
Sir Bedevere: Did you dress her up like this?
Peasant 1: No!
Peasant 3, Peasant 2: No!
Peasant 3: No!
Peasant 1: No!
Peasant 3, Peasant 2: No!
Peasant 1: Yes!
Peasant 2: Yes!
Peasant 1: Yeah a bit.
Peasant 3: A bit!
Peasant 1, Peasant 2: A bit!
Peasant 2: a bit
Peasant 1: But she has got a wart!
Random Person in the crowd: *cough* *cough*
King Arthur: I am your king.
Woman: Well I didn't vote for you.
King Arthur: You don't vote for kings.
Woman: Well how'd you become king then?
[Angelic music plays... ]
King Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king.
Dennis: [interrupting] Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
Sir Bedevere: ...and that, my liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana shaped.
King Arthur: This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedevere. Explain again how sheep's bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.
Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
Peasant 1: Burn them.
Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
Peasant 1: More witches.
Peasant 2: Wood.
Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
Peasant 3: ...because they're made of... wood?
Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond!
Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
Peasant 1: Bread.
Peasant 2: Apples.
Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
Peasant 1: Cider.
Peasant 2: Gravy.
Peasant 3: Cherries.
Peasant 1: Mud.
Peasant 2: Churches.
Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck.
Sir Bedevere: ...Exactly. So, logically...
Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
Sir Bedevere: And therefore...
Peasant 2: ...A witch!
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Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:08 pm
From Terry Pratchett's Hogfather Movie:
Susan(the most kick-a** heroine ever!!!!!): [Susan is reading the fairy tale "Jack and the beanstalk" to children] And then Jack chopped down what was the world's last beanstalk, adding murder and ecological terrorism to the theft, enticement and trespass charges already mentioned and all the giant's children didn't have a daddy any more. But he got away with it and lived happily ever after without so much as a guilty twinge about what he had done. Which proves that you can be excused just about anything if you're a hero, because no one asks inconvenient questions.
Lord Downey: Mr. Teatime, are you telling me you have actually sat down and given thought into how to inhume(kill) Death?
Teatime: Everyone has a weakness sir.
Death: Human beings make life so interesting. Do you know, that in a universe so full of wonders, they have managed to invent boredom.
Also from Terry Pratchett, the Soul Music movie/cartoon:
Death: I need to imbibe vast amounts of alcohol.
Death: I shall leave your room exactly as you left it...
Susan Sto Helit(YAY!!!!): Thank you.
Death: ...- a *mess*!
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