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 Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 10:23 pm
At the age of seven Michael Collins was diagnosed with leukemia. He spent his time in hospitals isolated from children his own age. Raven Nightshade also seven moved from foster home to foster home and could not form relationships. No one really wanted him. Out of loneliness and need the two formed a telepathic link, without ever having met. Both wrote it off as an imaginary friend. Michael went into remission and Raven's situation changed and neither were as desperately in need of the connection. They could still connect sometimes but the bond was weaker and more infrequent. They grew up, grew apart and then at the age of twenty four Michael learned that the cancer had come back. Alone and afraid he reached out to Raven desperate for that connection that had saved his life once before.
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Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2007 11:14 pm
Michael laid in bed. It was the loneliest he could ever remember feeling. He couldn't talk to anyone else about his fears and being in the hospital again was perhaps the most depressing feeling he had ever had. He needed something to hold onto but all there was was the impersonal white blanket and bland eggshell colored walls surrounding him. If there had ever been a question of his diagnosis he lost it in those moments. He could feel the illness within him separating him from everything. Separating him from the land of the living. He longed for someone to pass the time with. That connection that he had pondered so often was pulled back to the forefront of his mind. After he had recovered he told himself that it was an imaginary friend but he knew somehow that he had not been the person answering himself back.
He tried to establish the contact, to force himself back in by begging the universe for help. He sent out a silent plea to the other boy. Please stay with me tonight, Raven. I'm scared. No one else would understand but you. I feel so alone. I need you. he begged. He wanted the man more than anything else in the world. Without company he thought he might be driven mad. The hospital was stark and lonely. He was extremely vulnerable to infections and had managed to acquire one which was the reason he had landed himself in the hospital. He was sick from the leukemia and from the treatment. It was hard to say which was worse. Michael had the same type of leukemia that he had as a child, acute lymphoblastic leukemia. It meant that his symptoms came on fast and the disease was rapidly moving. The chemotherapy destroyed his system and between the two he had no immune system, no energy, stomach pains, headaches, joint pain, fevers, headaches, and shaking. He needed a reason to keep living.
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 7:47 pm
Snow blew in Raven’s face as he walked home from his job at the animal shelter. His red faded scarf only blocked a little of the snow from getting in his face. He carried some groceries from the corner store to his apartment. Since his work was close to his home, he felt no need to drive, even though he had a licence to drive. His lightly curly long black hair blew in the cold snow. His hands covered in red gloves still felt the cold breath of the winter’s wind. ‘I would be glad to get inside out of this storm. ******** weather men can’t predict anything. Slight snow storm my a**, this is a ******** blizzard.’ He thought to himself finally stepping inside the apartment building.
He passed by the other tenants that lived in the same building as him. He didn’t have many friends. He was distant from people; since he felt when he was a child no one wanted him. So many families he went through, His own parents never wanting him made him bitter. He moved the bags of food to his right hand as his left dug in his coat pocket to reach for his keys. When he finally had found them, he placed the right key in the door’s keyhole when he heard that voice, so faint and desperate, hearing the voice of his friend from so long ago. The boy who he thought was his imaginary friend. “Please stay with me tonight, Raven. I'm scared. No one else would understand but you. I feel so alone. I need you.”
Hearing that voice I in his mind caused Raven to drop his food on the floor. “s**t!” Raven shouted as he picked up the damaged food. Thankfully most of his precious cargo made it undamaged. Unlocking his door Raven walked in with his bags. “Michael is that you?” Raven asked out loud and in his mind, not sure if he was feeling the effects of the cold, making his mind hear voices.
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 8:18 pm
Michael heard the voice and felt a wave of calm wash over him as it had when he was a kid. He didn't feel as lonely. It was as if there was another presence there with him. He turned on his side and curled up under the blankets. He wondered if Raven ever spoke to anyone else like this. The question made him wonder but he did not ask. He wanted company more than anything in the whole world and so he had it. Michael responded only with his mind. If he spoke out loud to himself a nurse would come in and give him heavy drugs to sedate him. He'd wake up disoriented and groggy besides those drugs always screwed with his stomach.
Yes, it's me. I'm so glad you're here again. I thought you had stopped hearing me. he said. It was obvious how much that thought scared him. The idea of loosing Raven completely terrified him. Raven was his best friend, his lifeline, the only person who understood what was happening inside his head. He didn't keep his defenses up with Raven. Besides no one else had really cared much what he had to say. He had never had many friends even after he'd gone into remission. He just had nothing to say to kids his own age. Their life experiences had been different.
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 9:47 pm
Raven closed the door and locked it before walking into his kitchen. Opening his fridge he placed the food inside. “I can’t believe I am hearing from you. It’s been like 8 years I think. I am not too sure. I guess you are real. I wasn’t sure. I don’t have many friends. Unless I am going insane, well it wouldn’t surprise me. I’m kidding. So umm what have you been up too? Sorry I don’t have much practise starting conversations.” He said in his mind and out loud.
Raven sounded actually happy, Michael his friend had that effect on him. When Raven was a child he felt like he had no one until he made friends with Michael. Michael was in truth the only person he thought as family. Raven then started to get worried, the only time when Michael would talk with him before was when Michael was sick. Raven thoughts filled with worry. “Are you alright Michael?”
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Posted: Mon Sep 10, 2007 10:21 pm
Michael's breathing started to ease and steady as Raven spoke to him. He closed his eyes and concentrated only on the conversation going on in his head. Raven seemed almost at ease talking to him again. For Michael there was no awkwardness. It was as if he'd known this person all his life as if he fit back into his life so perfectly he might as well not have left. He understood easily, he had never been one who could easily start conversations either. He had really never learned. He was better off left to his sketch books, or water colors, his charcoals or pastels, art was the closest thing he had to a means of communication outside of the telepathic one he had lost years before. I understand Raven. he replied softly.
The question came and he knew he had to answer, if he was communicating with Raven again he felt sure he already knew. The leukemia has come back, I'm sick again. he replied. He didn't sugar coat it, tell him he'd be just fine or that it wasn't so bad. With Raven he could be honest, that was not a luxury he had with anyone else. He waited for the response half fearing that Raven would not want to talk to him anymore people often found it hard not knowing what to say.
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 7:33 pm
Raven paused and took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. So his friend was sick again. He slowly took of his gloves and coat and just threw them on his dinning room chair as he sat down on his couch. His hands still felt numb from the cold, yet he just forgot about them. All his thoughts focus on his friend that he never met face to face, yet seemed to know him forever. “Do you know which hospital you are staying at?” Raven asked as concern and sadness filled his voice and mind, which he tried to hide.
Slowly he took off his hat and removed his scarf, the reality of his friend’s illness got to him. His friend could die. Raven felt so guilty and shitty. He complained about his life, yet it couldn’t compare to what his friend was feeling now. “I want to see you, meet you face to face Michael. You’re the only family I have and my only good friend.”
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 7:52 pm
Michael held his breath as he waited. He wasn't sure until he heard Raven's voice again whether or not Raven still wanted to talk to him or knew what to say to him. He exhaled with relief as the words came, that was of course until he heard their meaning. He wasn't sure he really wanted anyone to see him in the condition he was in. The hospital gown, hair that was quickly falling out, and miserable symptoms robbed him of his dignity and pride. He wasn't sure that he wanted Raven to see him like that. Yet he wanted to meet him so badly.
I'm at St. Catherine's Hospital. I want to meet you more than anything. I feel the same way you do, but I don't know if I want anyone to see me like this. I look sick. Plus it's just a miserable place to visit. It's ugly. I don't want to scare you. he replied.
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 8:07 pm
Raven laughed at the last comment his friend made. “The s**t I went through, nothing can scare me, besides it doesn’t matter what you look like on the outside. I already know how you are on the inside. You’re my good kind, caring, compassionate and funny friend. No matter how you look you will be the same friend I knew back when I was just a seven year old boy. So stop putting yourself down. You probity don’t look that bad. I mean I saw some burn victims and they look pretty bad. But I can’t believe your in the city right near mine. I can drive to see you. My boss said I need time off anyway, something about being too bitchy or something, need time to relax. So I will book a hotel near your hospital and come by to see you. It’s only a 5 hour drive no big.”
His body and hands warmed up quickly by the heater heating the room. Raven smiled never had he thought he would meet his friend, or being living so close to him. He was going to meet his friend and family face to face, that thought alone calm his nerves and filled his grumpy demeanour with joy.
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 8:33 pm
Michael nearly laughed out loud at Raven's ridiculous comparison to burn victims. Michael might not be up for a modeling contract but he wasn't bad looking. He was just sick. He was kind of pale and tired looking, his hair was falling out and he looked a few years older because of how taxing the illness was on his body. He was amazed that Raven would do that for him, drop everything take off work, get a hotel room, and spend his vacation in a hospital. Thank you, it means so much you would do that for me. I can't wait to meet you. I tried to get through to you when I first found out I guess for whatever reason it wasn't working. I missed it, I mean I did before then too, I guess I'd just never thought to try. It always came so naturally before. Maybe if I get out of the hospital soon I can show you around my part of town. he offered. He didn't want Raven to come down there just to sit in a hospital. It was more motivation to fight the infection. Oh I forgot, you'll have to tell them we're related. You can tell them you're my step-brother Jack. I don't think anyone will fight you on it. he added. He knew that he had a step brother a few years younger than himself though he had only met him a handful of times. He knew that Jack wasn't coming to the hospital anytime soon and so he figured having Raven claim to be him was pretty safe.
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 8:54 pm
Raven laughed. “Jack hell I am no Jack. But I guess I can lie about being your step brother. But come on Jack. I am no Jack. “ he paused for a moment as his stomach growled. “******** I forgot that I haven’t had supper yet. If you don’t mind my friend I am going to make something to eat when we chat.” He said getting up from the couch and walked into his kitchen and opened his fridge, settling on some eggs and toast. A simple meal, but enough to satisfy his needs. He cracked the eggs into the pan, after putting some slices of bread in his toaster.
“Yum, breakfast for dinner. So you want me to come by tomorrow. I can probity be there at 6pm. Just have to pack tonight and make some calls. So what are your hobbies now, they still drawing and stuff like you told me before?” Raven asked as he started to get more used to talking in his mind.
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 9:05 pm
Michael let out a shy laugh and looked out into the hall to make sure that none of the night nurses were passing by. He was pleased to find that none of them were. I don't mind at all, thanks for keeping me company. he answered. I don't want to drag you away from whatever you have to do but it isn't like I'm going anywhere. If you make it here tomorrow that would be cool. Not sure when visiting hours are or anything but I don't think they'll be too picky not since you're family. he answered. Michael always loved opportunities to be able to talk about what he loved to do and it had been a long time for him. He had not been selling much of his art since his diagnosis. He'd been making art when he wasn't too tired or too ill but he wasn't selling much and was pretty disgusted at how his illness would play into the way it was marketed. Everyone knew that artists' pieces were always worth more after they were dead. He would wait until he was in the clear to sell anything unless he was selling it himself. Still it was the only therapy that had ever really done much for him, so he could not stop the creation of it. Yeah I'm really into art. I went to school for it and I do art for a living, most of it is drawings, but I've got some paintings and a couple of small sculptures and collages. What about you? he asked. What are you up to these days?
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 10:51 pm
“Glad to hear you still at your art. I would love to see your work some time. Hey anything is good. I can only draw stick figures, with is awful. But hell I don’t care ******** that smart.” Raven said as he lost concentration and his hand touch the side of the frying pan. Kissing his hand, he checked his eggs, seeing them cooked to satisfaction he placed them on a plate and turned off the element and then checked on his toast. Seeing them done, he took them out and started to butter them when he spoke once more in his mind. “Sorry for the long paused, wasn’t paying attention when I was cooking. I’m not hurt so you don’t need to worry Michael. “
Raven sat down with his eggs and toast after pouring himself a glass of orange juice. “So anyway you went to school to be an artist, that’s awesome. Really it is. Well I never really did get adopted and I had to leave the orphanage at 18. Father Callen felt sorry for me and gave me some cash and a job. My first job was washing dishes. Oh what a dream job.” He said in a sarcastic tone of voice as he took a bite of his sunny side up egg. “Yumm eggs, a simple yet delectable delight. So anyway I work at the restaurant Black Jack’s for awhile, but washing dishes for the rest of my life wasn’t my thing. I had my grade 12, but didn’t have the cash to go to school. Minim wage barely gave me enough to live by in the cheap bachelor’s room above a bar.”
Taking a bite in his toast and a sip from his orange juice, Raven continued to speak in his mind. “Well I volunteered at this animal shelter since I was 14. I kind of felt connected to them you know. I didn’t have a family and neither did all those animals. So they sort of became my furry family. I consider you my only true human family. Anyway after spending so many years there Michael I learned and did what all the vet techs did there as well as the duties of the volunteers did. I got so good, that I got the job to work there. But since I don’t have the school for a vet tech I get paid a little less. But who cares I get to have a job not washing dishes and get to spend time with my furry family so it’s all good. Man you know what I never talked this much with anyone before except you. I guess you are just special that’s all. Anyway you dated anyone? Are you a virgin?” Raven said the last sentence in his mind as a smirk appeared on his lips while biting down on his second piece of toast.
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Posted: Tue Sep 11, 2007 11:26 pm
Michael was concerned at the random swearing and then the period of silence. He thought maybe it was a bad idea that he was distracting Raven while he was probably cooking and dealing with a stove or an oven or something. He hoped that he hadn't done anything like accidentally burn down his kitchen. Raven? he asked. Once he heard Raven's voice again he relaxed some. He was glad that nothing serious had happened. Okay he replied. He supposed it was more distracting to have a conversation the way they did rather than on a phone because it required, in Michael's case anyway, a higher level of attention and connection. He was starting to grow more restless and uncomfortable. The fever had been getting worse at night.
He listened to Raven's story sorry that it hadn't worked out better for him. He listened to the rest of the story glad that Raven had a job he was happy in but innerly disappointed that he wasn't getting all that he deserved over a simple issue of schooling. He smiled when Raven said he was his family. No matter how many times Raven said it he never tired of hearing it. He was always glad to listen to pretty much anything that Raven had to say and listening to his account of the past several years he was interested by the course the other boy's life had taken. Then the question came...the awkward uncomfortable question that brought a bright pink color to his pale cheeks. The truth was that he had never really done a lot of dating. He'd gone on some dates but nothing had ever really come of it and so despite his age he was still a virgin. Still no matter how much he trusted, confided in, and even loved Raven he wasn't sure that those were things he was entirely comfortable talking about.
I...um...it's...I dated. he managed awkwardly. In college a little. He wasn't prepared to lie but he wasn't sure he had it in him to tell the truth either. He had to say something though. I...I am though. Are you? he asked, thinking that he must sound like the biggest looser ever. Twenty four was kind of old for him never to have done it.
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Posted: Wed Sep 12, 2007 10:54 am
“No I am not, I dated this one girl in high school turned out to be a total slut, but what can you do. Anyway I lost my virginity to her and a week later she dumped me for one of jocks. I forgot his name. Doesn’t matter now do it? Well good for you. Better a virg then losing it to a slut any day.” Raven said in his mind as he put the dishes in the sink and wash them before putting them away.
“If I put you in the spot I’m sorry even though I don’t apologise lightly for what I say, but your family so. Sorry again. Now if you don’t mind I am going to have a nice hot bath while I continue our conversation.” Raven said in his mind as he walked over to his bathroom and started to run the water. “So what else do you like? Because I know some peoples hobbies change over time. Just want to know a little more about you that’s all. It’s been awhile since we had use our gift if that’s the word for it, to communicate. So I’ll ask a few questions and you can ask if you want. Unless you’re tired and need rest.”
Raven said before he striped his clothes and entered the nice hot bath. “A nice hot bath makes everything better, especially after a long day of work.”
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