|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2007 7:07 am
I was so worried I wouldn't pass the English 111 course over the summer. It was online, and if it weren't for the fact that a 69 is considered a D instead of a F like it was in high school, well, yeah, I'd have to take that annoying class over again.
By the way, the first chapter of my MSTing series is almost finished. By almost, I mean so finished that all I have to do is add one scene to make everything connected. I tend to jump around a lot when I write, so often enough, the end will be finished long before the beginning, and a story will consist of various scenarios that just need connecting sequences to be complete.
So, hopefully in the not-too-distant future, you'll have another first chapter of a story that may never be touched again, but will provide you with false hope and a good laugh or two. Between a Golden Plot Device Fountain, a loathing of bubbles, and the damage to the fourth wall, there's gotta be something you'll find funny in there.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Sep 21, 2007 1:45 pm
The Joy of MSTing This is the moment you've all been waiting for... The first chapter of my fanfic MSTing series! Love it, hate it, or ignore it, here it is. Before reading this, please note that the MSTings do contain some spoilers for the actual EoFF. However, I don't think that will really be too much of a problem. Otherwise, there are a few other things you should know: The Cid of EoFF is actually a girl. Cid is short for Cindi (full name Brutoji Cindi). Harm (full name Stanglen Harmic) has blonde hair. Morchi (full name Kimo Lasha Morchi) is Randol's wife. All of the Kimos (Randol, Morchi, and Nadrei) are Hybrids. The exact definition of Hybrids in EoFF will be saved for a later date. Garke Sanders was a former party member that is now gone because of *OMGspoilers!! not telling* Other than that, enjoy. Remember, the fanfic being MSTed is bolded. Episode 1 Bubble of Love...Randol had long been aware that something was wrong. Dakra and Ukas had been suspiciously absent from everything and everyone for the past month. Niko had thought they might have some sort of secret relationship, but that just didn't add up. Even if they were a couple, neither seemed like the kind that would go to great lengths to hide that sort of thing. It had to be something else. He was even more suspicious when the two of them invited him, Nadrei, Harm, Cid, Niko, Cicada, even Morchi, to the Cluskas Family Library for a 'reunion.' Despite the warnings, never in his wildest dreams did he imagine this could happen. It was all a trap. Once the party arrived, they were forced into giant bubble living arrangements from which there was no escape. When they questioned Dakra about it the next time they saw her (on a digital display), she gave a vague answer about research and psychological effects of stressful conditions on Hybrids as compared to humans. Since Ukas was in on it, Randol could easily believe that there was some sort of bet involved. He didn't know what the deal was with Cicada, though. She wasn't in the bubble with the rest of them. "Randol, our all-high kidnapper is calling us." Morchi said, causing him to snap out of his revelry. "Maybe this time we'll actually find out what's going on." "Maybe. Just remember, dinner's at six." "You're not coming?" "Dakra specifically told me not to. She also said I'd be solely responsible for cooking and housekeeping duties, so I'll have plenty to keep me busy." "Why would she do that? Even for you, taking care of six people is too much." "Compared to what she has planned for the rest of you, it's a cakewalk." "You know what she's planning?" "Yes, but I am strictly forbidden to mention it before she does. You'll find out soon enough as it is." ~~~ Front and Center..."I hate bubbles." Nadrei complained, pacing back and forth in front of the digital display. The other three were sitting and waiting impatiently for Randol. "You can hate bubbles all you want, but do you really have to repeat it every five minutes?" Niko said, his boredom increasing substantially with every second that passed. "That's rich, coming from you." Cid let out a yawn, "But seriously, Nadrei, can you stop pacing? It's getting really annoying." "It's the only thing that's keeping me sane at the moment. This bubble has been bringing up very traumatizing memories ever since we got here." "Is your sanity more important than your life?" Niko stood up, ready to hurt someone, only to trip when Harm stuck his leg out. "Leave her alone. Randol will be here any moment, and then we can find out what's really happening from Dakra." "Thank you." Nadrei went back to pacing. Silence reigned for another minute or so until Randol finally showed. The moment he walked in, the digital display lit up. "About time." Dakra complained onscreen. "I was a whole two minutes late. Big deal. Now that I am here, mind telling us what the heck is going on?" "With pleasure. You five have the extraordinary privilege of participating in what is known as a 'Fanfic MSTing.' We'll be sending you horrible fanfiction and monitoring your minds the whole time. For purely scientific purposes, of course." "Hate to burst your bubble, pun intended, but that's been done before. Many times." "Ah, yes, it has, but not on Hybrids. In this case, we are breaking new ground." "Oh, please," Cid scoffed, "You can justify it all you want, but we all know it's just because Asmi-chan is a mental case that uses fiction as an outlet for violent and sadistic tendencies that would otherwise result in mass murder sprees." "Now, now, that may very well be the case, but in here, you'll be charged for damage to the fourth wall. Since this was your first offense, I'll let you off with a warning." "Not to be rude or anything, but isn't mentioning the fourth wall causing damage to the fourth wall in itself?" Harm asked. "Why, yes, it is, Harm, but thankfully, I've got immunity. Too bad you don't. Anyway, your very first assignment is a Magic Knight Rayearth songfic. Since it is the first time, it's not all that mind-numbingly awful, but it'll give you a taste of what's to come. Any questions?" "Yeah. Why isn't Cicada doing this, too?" Nadrei spoke up. "She's mute. We can't do a proper analysis of a subject if she can't talk, but don't imagine she won't have her share of trouble. Cicada's the one in charge of finding horrible fanfiction for you guys. Without further delay, I bring you I'm Sorry, by Potato Maiden. You may now enter the Fanfiction Theater." "What fanfiction theater? There's no-" Before Niko could finish his sentence, the floor underneath gave way, and all five victims dropped in highly comical fashion. ~~~ Cluskas Family Library...Ukas was very amused by this. In fact, his amusement was such as could only be described in the language of chatspeak: ROFLMAO. "That... Was... Priceless..." He said, then paused a moment to catch his breath, "You know, I was kind of skeptical about the trapdoor idea at first, but that turned out to be pretty good. And their reactions were very much reminiscent of the 'falling into Cephiro' scenes of Rayearth, making it even more appropriate." "Don't you think I already thought of that? Just sit down and put on the headset." "Yes, ma'am." ~~~ Bubble Fanfiction Theater...*Everybody lands in their own cushioned theater seats* Niko: Did Dakra get a hold of an Improbability Drive or something? Because all of us landing in the right seats is way too convenient to be possible in real life. Cid: If you would rather land on the floor, be my guest. What I want to know is why everything's script style. Harm: Quiet, I think it's starting. I’m SorryHarm: ... For ever writing this sorry excuse for a fic. What was I thinking?
Randol: You beat me to it.
A/n: Hey! Az here!
Nadrei: But I thought this was written by Potato Maiden.
Niko: Az here? Az what?
So here’s my newest songfic to the song “Without You” from once again, Jonathan Larson’s Rent
Cid: Oh, great, a songfic. Just what I always wanted.
I hope you guys like cause it took me a while to figure out how to do this. sweat drops So yeah...Oh! I don’t own anything! And...Clef is tall in this.
Randol: Not even past the author's note and they have to add something completely irrelevant.
“I...I love you Umi.” Umi looked up at Ascot and frowned slightly.
“I’m sorry Ascot...but, I love Clef...I’m sorry if I hurt you in anyway. I just love you like a friend. I’m really sorry.” Umi said looking down. Ascot nodded in a hurt way watching the blue haired beauty walk away to go find the guru.
Nadrei: Something about that sentence just annoys the heck out of me. I'm not sure why.
“At least I finally told her...” Ascot sighed to himself.
Niko: At least you're a character in a published series instead of a figment of some college student's imagination.
Harm: It's true, but why say it? Except for the first two words, it doesn't make much sense in this context.
Niko: Hey, it's my first time here. Cut me some slack.
(Without you
The ground thaws
The rain falls
Cid: *nasally singing* My skin crawls!
The grass grows)
“Mr. Ascot, what’s wrong?” Fuu asked seeing Ascot in the same spot for over an hour.
Harm: So, why exactly was Fuu watching him for over an hour?
Randol: I'd speculate logical possibilities, but really, we all know it's just careless writing on the author's part.
“Nothing Fuu, just thinking.” Ascot said snapping out of his daze.
“Its not like you to be so distant, did something happen?” Fuu put a hand on Ascot’s should in sympathy.
Nadrei: Ascot's should?
Cid: At least it's something spell check might have missed.
“I...I told Umi how I felt and well...she didn’t like me back in the same way.” Ascot finally admitted.
Randol: We find the defendant guilty as charged. Ascot is sentenced to imprisonment in this fanfic for the duration of our reading.
Harm: Hope he doesn't expect any sympathy out of us.
(Without you
The seeds root
The flowers bloom
The children play)
“I’m sorry Mr. Ascot, it just seems Umi reacted the wrong way, I’m sure she loves you.” Fuu said trying to cheer the young palu up.
Niko: As I must conclude you are not serious in your rejection of me, I shall attribute it to your wish of increasing my love by suspense, according to the usual practice of elegant females.
Cid: I have no pretensions to the elegance which consists in tormenting a respectable man. I would rather be believed sincere.
Harm: Wouldn't it be somewhat of an anachronism for us to know about Pride and Prejudice?
Cid: This entire series is an anachronism. Get used to it.
“No, she told me she loved me like a friend.” Ascot said in a monotone.
“Oh. Well, if I can help in anyway, just let me know.” Fuu smiled up at the palu before leaving.
Niko: I shall send you a package of mini-muffins at a moment's notice! All you have to do is ask.
“Clef! There you are!” Umi said hugging the mage from behind. Clef turned around and smiled at the magic knight.
“Hello Umi.” Clef kissed her lightly on the forehead.
“Hey Clef, I have a question.” Umi said letting go of the guru’s waist.
Nadrei: Where do babies come from?
Cid: How should I know? I'm 745 years old and it doesn't even look like I've hit puberty yet.
Nadrei: But you're supposed to be tall in this fanfic!
Cid: Oh, right... Why don't you go ask Presea?
“Yes?”
“Well...can you help me with a problem?”
“What kind of problem?” Umi held up a piece of paper with her math homework written on it.
Harm: She brings her homework with her to an alternate universe. That can't be healthy.
Niko: Yeah, Umi will grow up to be one of those people that take their job with them on vacation and don't spend any time with their kids because of it.
Harm: If she's not careful, those kids might turn out to be suicidal like you.
Niko: Suicidal? I'm not suicidal.
Harm: Oh, does purposely sinking a ship in the middle of the ocean not count as suicidal?
Niko: That was only once!
Nadrei: Guys, save it for later. Let's get this fic over with.
“My math, I don’t understand it. I’d ask Fuu except I can’t seem to find her. She must be with Ferio.” Umi sighed.
(The stars gleam
The poets dream
Cid: *nasally singing* Fangirls scream.
The eagles fly
Nadrei: Unless they're talking about Eagle Vision near the end of the Magic Knight Rayearth Season 2 anime. The manga was so much better.
Without you)
“Math? That’s what you needed me for?” Clef asked looking down and the water knight.
“Uh...yes. I would ask Fuu except, she’s not around.” Umi said again.
Niko: I heard you the first time, stupid blonde.
Cid: Doesn't Umi have blue hair?
Niko: Sure, but that can't be natural. My bet is that she was originally blonde.
Harm: The kind that gives the rest of us blondes a bad name, no doubt.
Clef sighed and helped Umi with her math. (A/n: I know what you’re thinking. Just go with it.)
Nadrei: Gasp! A psychic!
Harm: If she knew what we were thinking, she would never dare to write this crap in the first place.
“There you go, do you understand it now?” Clef asked seeing the look of comprehension on Umi’s face.
Randol: You comprehend this fanfic?
“Hai. Arigato Clef!” Umi hugged him again before running toward her room.
Nadrei: Yes, I see it now! This fanfic makes perfect sense!
Niko: Excellent. Now you can teach me.
(The earth turns
The sun burns
Cid: *nasally singing* My stomach churns!
But I die
Without you)
“Hey Umi, do ya know what’s up with Ascot? He seems so distant and he wont talk to anyone. Maybe you could help.” Caldina said stopping Umi in the hall.
“I don’t know, he looked fine when I talked to him a couple hours ago.” Umi replied. Caldina sighed in worry.
“Did y’all talk about anything?” Caldina asked.
“Well...he told me that he loved me.” Umi said thoughtfully.
Cid: But that's probably not the issue.
Niko: Maybe it was something he had for lunch.
“What did you say?”
Nadrei: I said, he told me that he loved me. Pay attention!
“I told him that I loved him the same way I love my friends. Not in an intimate way.” Caldina looked at Umi and cursed under her breath.
Cid: %&*#$@, can't anyone curse in the open anymore?
Randol: Apparently not.
“That’s why, maybe you should talk to him. He wont listen to anyone else.” Caldina said after a moment of silence. Umi nodded and walked to her room to put away her homework before heading for Ascot’s room.
Niko: Was it really necessary to reassure us that Umi's homework was taken care of?
Harm: Could it be symbolic? Before approaching Ascot, she must put away the homework that Clef helped her with. She's ready to focus on the future, instead of dwelling on past math problems!
Randol: Let's just say it doesn't matter and leave it at that.
Harm: Yeah, you're right. No point in putting more thought into a fanfic than the original author did.
(Without you
The breeze warms
Cid: Yeah, global warming just seems to accelerate when you're not around, you know?
The girl smiles
The cloud moves
Without you
The tides change
The boys run
The oceans crash)
Umi knocked on Ascot’s door.
Cid: Knock knock!
Niko: Who's there?
Cid: Umi!
Niko: Umi who?
Cid: Umi. The girl you love? Remember? Screw this, if you're gonna forget my name in an hour, I'm going back to Clef.
Harm: *whispers* Shh! Not so loud! Where do you think the name Asmi-chan came from?
Cid: Oh, right. Sorry.
“Who is it?” The palu asked quietly.
“Its me, open up.” Umi said in annoyance. She was getting tired of waiting and was just about to kick the door down when he opened up.
Nadrei: Hurry up! I've been standing here for a whole five seconds! What's taking you so long? Gosh.
“Oh, hey Umi.” He didn’t look at her face, only at her feet.
“Ascot, my face is up here. My feet cant talk.” Umi said lifting his head so she could look, or attempt to look, in his emerald eyes. “What’s wrong? Is it because what I said?” Umi asked in a concerned matter.
Harm: Actually, you're wearing two different shoes today.
“Well...yes, I just cant get over the fact that I love you.”
Niko: I mean, it's been almost an entire hour since you rejected me and all. It shouldn't take this long.
Nadrei: We've all seen how impatient Umi gets.
Ascot said looking into sapphire orbs.
Randol: Umi had vanished into thin air, leaving only a pile of sapphire orbs behind her.
Cid: It's called eyes, people.
(The crowds roar
The days soar
Cid: *nasally singing* The teens who-
Randol: *covers Nadrei's ears*
Cid: -re.
Randol: *uncovers Nadrei's ears*
Nadrei: Like I really don't know what word it was.
The babies cry
Without you
The moon glows
The river flows
Cid: *still nasally singing* This fic blows.
But I die
Without you
The world revives
Colors renew)
“Ascot, I...” Umi stopped, she couldn’t say it. She took Ascot’s hand and lead him inside his room.
Niko: Hey, is anybody else wondering if this might turn out to be a lemon in disguise?
Cid: No, just you.
Randol: Dakra already said this wasn't going to be mind-numbingly awful. Relax.
“U-Umi...what are you doing?” Ascot said as Umi sat on his bed next to him.
Niko: You positive about that?
Cid: Just shut up and read the stupid fanfic.
“Ascot, I love you...really I do. I...I just don’t know why I have a sudden change of feelings. Oh its so confusing!”
Nadrei: Fickle, thy name is Umi.
Harm: She needs to resolve her commitment issues before going out with either of the two.
She said in frustration. Ascot tucked a strand of sky blue hair behind her ear and took her hand leading her out to the garden.
“C’mon Umi, lets go.” Ascot said half dragging the magic knight.
Niko: Half dragging and half catapulting!
Cid: How would that even work?
Niko: Just forget it. I tried.
“Go where?” Umi asked in curiosity. When they arrived at the garden Umi smirked. “Why are we at the garden?”
Harm: Because the author said so. If the author says you're trapped in a bubble with no possibility of escape and only bad fanfiction to look forward to, you know what happens? You're trapped in a bubble with no possibility of escape and only bad fanfiction to look forward to! If you're really lucky, you might get an author that uses spell check.
Nadrei: Say, didn't Dakra say we'd be charged for damage to the fourth wall? How's that going to work since Ukas took all our gil beforehand?
Randol: She'll find a way, trust me.
(But I know blue
Only blue
Lonely blue
Within me, blue
Everybody: I'm blue, da-va-dee da-va-di...
Without you
Without you
The hand gropes
Niko: LEMON ALERT!
Cid: I thought I told you to shut up about that.
The ear hears
The pulse beats)
“Here, this is what I was looking for.” Ascot pulled Umi over to a golden fountain. The water was a shade of midnight blue, as if it was enriched with such pure minerals.
Nadrei: Welcome to the Golden Fountain, Cephiro's latest tourist trap! It's enriched with such pure minerals!
Harm: Is that like the Golden Saucer?
Nadrei: Nah, more like Mideel, if anything.
“What is this?” Umi looked into the waters depths before seeing her face and the faces of Clef and Ascot.
“Don’t look in there yet. Its some kind of fountain Clef discovered. Its like a deciding fountain. What you do is you look in it and it’ll show the right decision for you to live a happy life. Then you take a drink of it if you accept what it shows you.” Ascot explained. Umi nodded in understanding.
Randol: So, in other words, it's a Deus Ex Machina.
Nadrei: From now on, this will be called the Weirdo Golden Plot Device Fountain of Cephiro!
Cid: I do not think the citizens of Cephiro will appreciate the new name.
Nadrei: Fuu? How'd you get here?
Cid: Why, I used the Golden Plot Device Fountain, of course.
“So I just look in it?” Umi asked.
Niko: Actually, you're supposed to stick your head in there, leave it sitting for five minutes, and all your troubles will be over!
Ascot nodded before leaving the young woman alone.
Harm: Little did he realize that there was someone in the bushes, waiting to kidnap Umi and steal the secrets of the Golden Plot Device Fountain for himself!
Randol: It would make for a more interesting read, no doubt, but somehow I don't think that's what the author intends.
Harm: Dang.
(Without you
The eyes gaze
The legs walk
The lungs breathe
The mind churns
The heart yearns
Cid: *nasally singing* This fic burns.
Niko: Only in a perfect world.
The tears dry
Without you
Life goes on
But I'm gone
Cid: *nasally singing* And I yawn.
Cause I die)
Umi saw the palu walk off and looked into the midnight blue water. The two faces appeared again. After what seemed like hours of staring, one of the faces disappeared. Umi took her hands and cupped the water. The water changed from its midnight blue to a red color before Umi’s eyes.
Harm: It was then that Umi realized she was bleeding. Maniacal laughter came from behind the bushes, and everything went black.
Nadrei: For the use of a Golden Plot Device Fountain comes at a terrible cost, and unfortunately for Umi, the price was her life.
Niko: Hey, this is actually starting to get interesting.
She held her hands up to her mouth and drank the water. Umi shivered. Drinking the water sent a cold chill down her spine.
Randol: Simplified to 'She drank the water. It sent a chill down her spine.' That was too many words for a simple action that needs no elaboration.
Nadrei: Time and space itself stood still for Umi's water drinking ritual.
She stood up from the edge of the fountain and walked through the castle to her true loves room. When he opened up the door he looked into her eyes and her into his. She hugged him and soon was swept up into a loving, passionate kiss.
Niko: All names changed to protect identity.
Harm: I could see why they wouldn't want to be recognized in this fic.
(Without you
Cid: *sings* I will sue.
Without you
Harm: *sings* Mountain Dew.
Without you
Randol: *sings* Get a clue.
Without you)
Everybody: *sings* It is through!
--End
A/n: Who Umi chose, is up to you. I made it clear that she loves both men. And both love her.
Cid: Because helping someone with their math homework is such an obvious display of love. *rolls eyes*
Niko: But by that logic, since Fuu normally helps Umi with the homework-
Harm: *smacks Niko* Not another word from you.
I wont say who she got because its my opinion.
Nadrei: Yes, by all means, be politically correct.
Randol: Lord forbid fanfiction contain anything remotely close to thought.
Niko: Ouch.
Just like if Bob says they like it to be Asmi, good for you. Or if Jill says Clemi, good for them.
Harm: Or if Carl says it should be a threesome, good for him.
Nadrei: Harm!
Randol: And you were telling Niko to shut up.
Niko: So, if it's Asmi, it would be good for us, and if it's Clemi, it's good for Jill?
Cid: Asmi, in that case. Who cares about Jill?
Niko: Yeah, her brain's never been the same since that incident with the well and the pail of water.
The point is, actions speak louder then words. There’s always more then one option in life and sometimes, you’ll need a little help. With Umi, it was that fountain. For us, it’s a lot of things.
Nadrei: This story was supposed to have a moral?
Cid: Could've fooled me.
So review and tell me who you think the person is. If you think its both, it doesn’t work.
Harm: There goes my theory.
Niko: Actually, the theory could still stand, depending on who owns the 'both'.
Everyone else: ?
Niko: You know... 'Its both', as opposed to 'it's both'?
Randol: Points for trying, but, frankly, it doesn't work.
Niko: I know that it doesn't work! Even the author knows it doesn't work, so it can't afford an apostrophe along with the s!
Randol: That was a little better, but still too obscure.
If you think its another character, have fun. So review and I’ll be back!!
Nadrei: Don't you threaten me!!
Cid: Really, who does she think she is?
Oh! And a note to those that read and/or reviewed “Your Eyes” thanks a lot cause someone asked me make a sequel, but instead, I just made another one.
Harm: Which is worse, the bad fanfiction writers or the people that encourage bad fanfiction writers to write more bad fanfiction?
Randol: Well, on one hand, the reviewers aren't necessarily writing the bad fanfiction themselves, but on the other hand, those reviewers either lack the spine to tell people what they really think or they write fanfiction that's just as bad or worse, so this stuff looks good in comparison.
Harm: Or the reviewers are friends of the writer.
Randol: That too.
It can be a sequel if you want it to be, just the kids and everyone are pretty much gone but that’s besides the point. A little bit of Az fluff for ya! Don’t let the rattlesnake bite ya! Bai!!
Randol: Fanfic analysis, anyone?
Nadrei: The grammar and spelling was, at the very least, legible, and there were no Mary Sues.
Cid: But the plot sucked.
Harm: The song could, and should, have been left out entirely. It had nothing to do with the story being told, and was completely pointless.
Niko: Come on, the entire story was pointless. If it weren't pointless, there'd be no need for the Golden Plot Device Fountain.
Randol: Agreed. Even if the author didn't have the song, specified what pairing it was, and didn't try to add a moral that just wasn't there, it was nothing but a corny fanfic that will hopefully be
taken off the web as soon as the author grows up enough to realize how stupid it was.
Nadrei: Can we go now?
~~~
Holocabana, 10 minutes later...
"I've chosen... Ascot, I love you!" Nadrei said, dressed in Umi's magic knight gear. Harm was adorned in Ascot's summoner attire.
"Booya! In your face, Clef!" Harm laughed at the Sanders simulation (dressed up as Clef).
"But, but... I helped you with your math! It was quadratic equations!"
"So? You're short and you're 745 years old."
"Not in this fanfic! The author made me tall!"
"I know what you're getting at, but you two would be better as Fuu and Ferio." Morchi interrupted the program, "Dinner's ready, by the way."
"Bonzai!" Both Nadrei and Harm headed for the dining room at the speed of mopeds.
"Reading bad fanfiction sure takes a lot out of you. I feel like I could eat an entire chocobo." Niko said with a grumbling stomach that served to illustrate the point.
"When you're right, you're right. Too bad it's not that often." Cid replied with a smirk.
"Hey!" The two of them snarked back and forth all the way out of the Holocabana.
"You coming, Randol?" Morchi asked. Randol had just been sitting there, dressed as Lantis, looking thoughtful.
"Hmm? Oh, right, dinner. Of course."
"Something on your mind?"
"Plenty. I'm just trying to make sense of everything that's happened so far."
"I wouldn't worry too much. Whatever Dakra's true intentions are, I'm sure we'll find out in due time. Besides, there's fried ptyste for dinner tonight."
"Morchi, have I ever told you how much I love you?"
"Only once per meal."
~~~
Cluskas Family Library...
In one corner of the library, there was a large sticker board with 'Damage to the Fourth Wall' written at the top. It was Cicada's job to tally the instances when they occurred, and this was how the board looked thus far:
"Harm's in the lead so far, eh? Well, it might be funny now, but once he gets thirteen of them, he won't be laughing anymore. We will be." Dakra smirked, thinking of all the fun she was going to have with this.
"Can I leave now? All this gil is just waiting to be gambled." Ukas picked up the large bag of gil.
"Yes, you may go. Be back by sunrise."
"You betcha." The gambler left the library whistling a happy tune. Dakra waited until he was out of the house, and then took out three carry-out boxes.
"That just means more fried ptyste for us, doesn't it, Cicada?"
END Any comments, people? There's still tea, Reese's, mini-muffins, and lemonade. *has a Reese's*
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
princess_Im_bored Captain
|
Posted: Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:51 am
I liked the last one. Sorry it took me so long to read it redface , it's so long it took me a while to finally find time.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Oct 04, 2007 6:38 am
Yeah, that MST was pretty long. The next chapter was supposed to be longer, but if I ever get it done, it'll probably be posted in parts.
Glad you enjoyed it. Anybody have a favorite line or scene from the MST? Just curious.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
princess_Im_bored Captain
|
Posted: Thu Oct 04, 2007 7:31 am
I liked this part: Quote: Harm: Which is worse, the bad fanfiction writers or the people that encourage bad fanfiction writers to write more bad fanfiction? Randol: Well, on one hand, the reviewers aren't necessarily writing the bad fanfiction themselves, but on the other hand, those reviewers either lack the spine to tell people what they really think or they write fanfiction that's just as bad or worse, so this stuff looks good in comparison. Harm: Or the reviewers are friends of the writer. Randol: That too.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 8:13 am
princess_Im_bored I liked this part: Quote: Harm: Which is worse, the bad fanfiction writers or the people that encourage bad fanfiction writers to write more bad fanfiction? Randol: Well, on one hand, the reviewers aren't necessarily writing the bad fanfiction themselves, but on the other hand, those reviewers either lack the spine to tell people what they really think or they write fanfiction that's just as bad or worse, so this stuff looks good in comparison. Harm: Or the reviewers are friends of the writer. Randol: That too. I always found it funny how obviously horrible fanfics will get glowing reviews despite the suckiness. I tried to think of reasons why that could happen, and those three are the best ones I could come up with. It's also funny how bad fanfiction writers will react to someone who doesn't like their fanfiction. Here's two samples I've found among my bad fanfiction files. Quote: Kelia2: I have had a person call my OC a Marysue(sorry if i cant spell)and it got me thinkin'.So I thought I should describe her to see if she should seem like a Marysue then. Yeah, like that ever works. Quote: Kelia2: Alright...I am going to egnore that anonymous-tan reveiw I got 'cause they are obviously too scared to stand up to me and my army of friends(by the way if you're reading this just know that my friend Kayte is like a bloodhound and will find you and let her army of evil moogles and kittens attack you). This particular author was a practically perfect example of a Mary Sue, no joke. You'll see for yourselves if I get to that MST.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
princess_Im_bored Captain
|
Posted: Sat Oct 06, 2007 7:10 am
Yes well, I had problem of trying to develop my own distinctive writing style and then trying to post a sample of my story writing on the writers forum. While I will be the first to admit that my writing needs more then a little work, I have stopped sharing it of late because I find it just to embarrassing, I wasn't getting people who were trying to help me work that out. What I was getting was a bunch of people who were trying to get me to write the same type of story, in the same formate, as everyone else on the forum. So I stopped going on the writers forum completely. It got boring.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 11:32 am
princess_Im_bored Yes well, I had problem of trying to develop my own distinctive writing style and then trying to post a sample of my story writing on the writers forum. While I will be the first to admit that my writing needs more then a little work, I have stopped sharing it of late because I find it just to embarrassing, I wasn't getting people who were trying to help me work that out. What I was getting was a bunch of people who were trying to get me to write the same type of story, in the same formate, as everyone else on the forum. So I stopped going on the writers forum completely. It got boring. Hmm... That gets me going on a random train of thought. What if the world became so dumbed down that the only right way to write a story was in a 'd**k and Jane' format? You know, short and simple sentences, just two characters and a dog with names that were easy to remember. If you were really creative, you might have a cat instead of a dog, or set the story on some alien planet with exactly the same living conditions as Earth. They'd have to make new abridged versions of earlier novels because people wouldn't understand the original source anymore. The new opening line for 'Pride and Prejudice' would be something like: Rich men want wives. Everyone knows this. A rich man came to town. His name was Charles.Yes, Mr. Bingley is just Charles, because Mr. Bingley would be far too complex for future minds to remember. Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy would be Liz and Will. At least Jane would get to keep her name. And with that train of thought, I return to my corner after my little hiatus. Let's hope that something good comes of it. So, how have you people been? I'm taking a break from college classes this semester to get my GED. I'll also be working with an English tutor, because even though I enjoy reading and writing, English has always been my worst subject. Probably because English teachers have the unrealistic expectation that everyone should see deeper meaning in words that describe some guy brushing his teeth on pg. 114, and because all those little steps they make you use in the writing process drain my life force like almost nothing else can.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
princess_Im_bored Captain
|
Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 9:29 am
Actually English has always been my best subject but every time I feel like I am selling my soul. I mean the only way to get a good grade is to give the teachers what they want. They want essays about your thoughts that are full emotion and they never consider that maybe you aren't an emotional person. Or they want you to find the authors motivation for writing a book, never considering the idea that maybe the author wrote for fun, or because they were strapped for cash and it seemed like an easy job with no heavy lifting.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 7:44 am
princess_Im_bored Actually English has always been my best subject but every time I feel like I am selling my soul. I mean the only way to get a good grade is to give the teachers what they want. They want essays about your thoughts that are full emotion and they never consider that maybe you aren't an emotional person. Or they want you to find the authors motivation for writing a book, never considering the idea that maybe the author wrote for fun, or because they were strapped for cash and it seemed like an easy job with no heavy lifting. Makes you wonder what English teachers do on their days off. Do they come up with ways to turn even the best books into a soul-sucking task? Try to find a topic for an essay that no one will enjoy writing about? Or maybe they just reorganize the soul collection they've got in the basement and invite other English teachers over to show it off. "This was Henry Johnson. I captured it with an essay on what his parents do for a living. Here you see Claudia Jones, she didn't make it past 'What I Did Last Summer.' Next is my personal favorite, Jeffery Kingston. He was a tough catch, withstanding even my brilliantly mundane story analysis assignment on 'The Old Man and the Sea,' but I finally broke him with a 5 page paper on the usage of colons and semi-colons." He'd/She'd say. The other English teachers would ooh and ahh over each soul, but then whisper behind the host's/hostess' back about how their collection is far superior (using perfect grammar, of course). After all of that, they'd gather in the parlor for prune juice and discuss the latest soul-sucking techniques. You gotta admit, it would explain a lot.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 10:36 am
A Good Look at 'Elvish Warfare' Normally, I would use a 'Bits and Pieces about Asmi-chan's Original Stuff' header for this sort of thing, but I felt like going into more detail than that usually covers. This is my newest idea, and as is the case with many new ideas while they are still fresh, the waves of inspiration keep coming. Elvish Warfare is a fantasy story (looking to be around one or two novels length at this rate) set in an alternate universe where humans are seriously evil, not evil as in oh-they-may-seem-bad-for-now-but-just-wait-til-the-end-and-everything-will-be-hunky-dory evil, but as in utterly-depraved-and-no-chance-of-redemption evil. Ever since the earliest days of this world, humans have been trying to wipe out the elves and take control of the Elvish Territories. At the point where the actual story begins, it seems only a matter of time before they succeed. Now that you get the general idea, let's focus on the elves. The elves are divided by clans, and each clan has specialties that it does better than any other clan, no exceptions. Other clans may be capable of doing something that a clan specializes in, but they'll never do it nearly as well. It's not forced to be that way, it just turns out that elves of the same clan are all exceptionally gifted in that one thing. Isn't it fun to just make up random names for stuff in fantasy stories? Here's the clans I have so far, along their specialty/specialties: Quote: Baj Wau- Magic, Manipulation of the elements Eneve- Trade, Business Fledipier- Art and Music Gryph- Animal Knowledge/Control Kangor- Culinary Arts Meshi- Battle Arts Nhadil- Farming Palven- Healing, Medicine Shouzo- Cleaning, Sewing Vassat- Map-making, Landscaping Yosler- The best pubs are run by Yoslers. That's all anybody knows about the clan. That's not all the clans, but it's all the ones I've come up with so far. The specialty of a clan also affects the personality and quirks of its members. For example, the Eneve are shrewd, clever, and calculating, but rather selfish, almost always putting themselves above everyone else. The warriors of Meshi can fight with words as well as weapons. In an argument, a Meshi can either stop the debate in its tracks or have some fun teasing the other side before killing the topic, but regardless, the Meshi wins. The Shouzo keep their houses and themselves immaculately clean, and place a great deal of importance on appearances. The Fledipier are unpredictable, driven by random inspiration. And so on and so forth. If anybody wants to suggest a new clan, just make up a random word, give it a specialty, and suggest it here. Got stuff to do now, so bye.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Feb 12, 2008 3:13 pm
Another Good Look at 'Elvish Warfare' It didn't take me too long to do the stuff I needed to do, so I decided to come back and say a little more about the story. Really, I don't have anything better to do. I mentioned before how the humans are getting very close to gaining control of the Elvish Territories. In previous wars with the humans, the Elvish Army had little difficulty driving the humans back to their own lands, but this time, the humans started the war by hitting the elves where it hurt the most: The Meshi clan. Years of careful planning by the humans resulted in the entire city-fortress of the Meshi clan being set on fire with all its residents trapped inside. The smoke got the attention of other clans. By the time they got there, the fire had been put out by heavy rains, but all that was left standing was the thick stone walls of the fortress. Everything else was ash. That became known as the Meshi Massacre. The rest of the elves tried to avenge their fallen clan in the new war, but without their warrior clan, they found it took everything they had just to stall the humans. Over the course of the next ten years, the humans pushed the elves further and further back into their own lands. The Baj Wau, along with several other clans, had to relocate when their homes were taken. When the story begins, the fighting has reached the border between the Palven and Gryph clans. But, that won't actually matter for a little while, because the first part has almost no correlation to the big bad war going on. Instead, it focuses on the problems of a guy from the Shouzo clan. Seems kinda like when you watch the news and it jumps from the topic of a natural disaster that wiped out thousands to discussing what Britney Spears has been up to. As noted before, the specialties of the Shouzo clan are cleaning and sewing. They're like the Home Economics clan, minus cooking, because that specialty belongs to Kangor. They're not all that useful during a war, save for uniform washing and mending. This particular Shouzo, Rakir, decided to try and join the Elvish Army a little while back, but failed boot camp. He comes back home to find out that his girlfriend, Meroira, was kidnapped by humans. Why? Because she's pretty. Really really pretty. That's pretty much the only reason (pun not intended, but laugh anyway). So, off he goes to save her. Trouble? You betcha. He has only a vague idea of which way the humans took her, he can't fight to save his own life, let alone someone else's, and furthermore, he has to stop every ten minutes to clean the dirt off his boots. Yeah, by himself, Rakir gets as far as the first human along the road. The human has no trouble wiping the floor with the guy (stupid unintentional puns...), but all is not lost, because before it's too late- (Because I have gone from completely serious to downright silly and feel like making fun of my own story, the next paragraph will feature a eek emoticon next to each plot twist.) -a random girl jumps in and saves the day with mad skills eek . At first, Rakir is speechless, partly because he didn't die, and partly because the new character looks like she hasn't had a bath in ages. As it turns out she recognizes him, and after a minute, he can remember her name eek . It's Aji, an old friend he just barely remembers from a very long time ago eek . However, her name is just about all he can remember, and that's actually a nickname. Doesn't remember how long ago it was, what actually happened, or even what clan she belonged to... burning_eyes But, I won't leave you guys hanging here. Wouldn't be surprised if some have already figured out the main idea here. Ajimima, as is her full name, is a Meshi. Yes, as in the Meshi that were supposedly completely wiped out about ten years ago. Yes, this story features a last-of-the-insert-special-designation-here character. But Rakir doesn't realize this yet, and I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell him. confused Feeling too silly to continue. Now, if you'll excuse me, I still have to vote.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
princess_Im_bored Captain
|
Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 9:24 am
no offense intended but isn't the whole last-survivor-of-warrior-tribe character a bit over used? Not that you can't pull it off it will just take more work I think because of the problem of catching the readers interest with something that has been used so often. I am actually having that problem myself.... crying . Different over used plot device for me though.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2008 11:36 am
princess_Im_bored no offense intended but isn't the whole last-survivor-of-warrior-tribe character a bit over used? Not that you can't pull it off it will just take more work I think because of the problem of catching the readers interest with something that has been used so often. I am actually having that problem myself.... crying . Different over used plot device for me though. Don't worry, I am not in the least bit offended. I agree that the lone survivor plot is generally overdone, and that overused plot devices are tricky business. If you don't know what you're doing, or even if you do know what you're doing but get careless, a plot contrivance like that can get completely out of hand and ruin a story. However, I also believe myself capable of handling a few plot devices without things going haywire. Not saying that it wouldn't happen, cause that's just begging for an ironic intervention, but as long as I keep my wits about me, it shouldn't be a problem. Or, if it is a problem despite all that, I'll try to learn from it. One thing I'm trying to do with Elvish Warfare is to set a limit on how much of the story hinges on my 'lone survivor' character. At the very least, I want the main focus to be evenly split between Aji and Rakir so that neither carries the complete story by themselves. In addition, I'd like to go into more depth with other characters. My next post will probably detail some of those other characters in the story, including but by no means limited to, Meroira of the Shouzo clan, General Solsrin of the Baj Wau clan, Lord Deifer, Lieutenant Havvol of the Eneve clan, and the Head Washer Lady of Mel District (Shouzo clan).
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
princess_Im_bored Captain
|
Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 8:44 am
Yeah the problem is how plots seem to sometimes take on a life of their own, as do characters. I once had a character who was written as a minor character. He then took over the story. And yes, saying that you can handle your plots is just asking for trouble, they might hear you. Okay, maybe it's just my oddness but I'm telling you, you have to watch your plots and characters or they'll do whatever they want. sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
