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 Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 10:15 am
Terje's sister got pregnant about two years ago (out of wedlock). She still hasn't married the guy, though he's a big part of Sebastian's life. They probably will get married, but that was only established recently.
It might make things a little difficult on a child to have parents that aren't married, but it's even harder to have parents who're fighting all the time because they're unhappy.
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Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 6:17 pm
Beware the Jabberwock I wouldn't do it. Marriage is a commitment between two people, it has nothing to do with anything else, period. If it's not someone you want to commit to for the rest of your life, what's the point of getting married?
My boyfriend said basically the same thing, that if I was to get pregnant we would get married and my response was, "I'm not getting married until I'm ready and until I've been with someone long enough to know I want to marry them. That's not going to magically change if I have a kid." I dun knwo why...but I go 4laugh at the thought of you with a big ol' preggers belly <.< K...that was weird...even for me. Shutting up now.
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Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 6:24 pm
Tiger of the Fire Beware the Jabberwock I wouldn't do it. Marriage is a commitment between two people, it has nothing to do with anything else, period. If it's not someone you want to commit to for the rest of your life, what's the point of getting married?
My boyfriend said basically the same thing, that if I was to get pregnant we would get married and my response was, "I'm not getting married until I'm ready and until I've been with someone long enough to know I want to marry them. That's not going to magically change if I have a kid." I dun knwo why...but I go 4laugh at the thought of you with a big ol' preggers belly <.< K...that was weird...even for me. Shutting up now.
Edit: And nobody should have to marry someone just because they have a new little link between each other. ^ ^ If their feelings fail, they'll still love the kid and I was raised by my mom only and I turned out okay.
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Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 11:09 pm
Tiger of the Fire Beware the Jabberwock I wouldn't do it. Marriage is a commitment between two people, it has nothing to do with anything else, period. If it's not someone you want to commit to for the rest of your life, what's the point of getting married?
My boyfriend said basically the same thing, that if I was to get pregnant we would get married and my response was, "I'm not getting married until I'm ready and until I've been with someone long enough to know I want to marry them. That's not going to magically change if I have a kid." I dun knwo why...but I go 4laugh at the thought of you with a big ol' preggers belly <.< K...that was weird...even for me. Shutting up now.
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Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 11:12 pm
Lorysa Tiger of the Fire Beware the Jabberwock I wouldn't do it. Marriage is a commitment between two people, it has nothing to do with anything else, period. If it's not someone you want to commit to for the rest of your life, what's the point of getting married?
My boyfriend said basically the same thing, that if I was to get pregnant we would get married and my response was, "I'm not getting married until I'm ready and until I've been with someone long enough to know I want to marry them. That's not going to magically change if I have a kid." I dun knwo why...but I go 4laugh at the thought of you with a big ol' preggers belly <.< K...that was weird...even for me. Shutting up now.
Edit: And nobody should have to marry someone just because they have a new little link between each other. ^ ^ If their feelings fail, they'll still love the kid and I was raised by my mom only and I turned out okay.
Sorry love, but JP wants to raise the child if I get preggers, so no adoption pour moi. You'll still be my protege though! My children aren't allowed being anything like me. XD
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Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 11:47 pm
Beware the Jabberwock Tiger of the Fire Beware the Jabberwock I wouldn't do it. Marriage is a commitment between two people, it has nothing to do with anything else, period. If it's not someone you want to commit to for the rest of your life, what's the point of getting married?
My boyfriend said basically the same thing, that if I was to get pregnant we would get married and my response was, "I'm not getting married until I'm ready and until I've been with someone long enough to know I want to marry them. That's not going to magically change if I have a kid." I dun knwo why...but I go 4laugh at the thought of you with a big ol' preggers belly <.< K...that was weird...even for me. Shutting up now. I'm not liek that. My hunny-bunch, sugar plumb, snookems snookems, splor is good enough for me. I have no use for a dungeon pet *caughyetcough*
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Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2007 11:48 pm
Yes, the child will grow up like me. A Knight of the Green, hunting Tofu Dragons and 'accedentaly' killing coart jesters.
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Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2007 7:11 am
Tiger of the Fire I'm not liek that. My hunny-bunch, sugar plumb, snookems snookems, splor is good enough for me. I have no use for a dungeon pet *caughyetcough*
I'm on to you.
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Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2007 2:38 pm
This is a tough one for me. Do I think a couple should get married just because they're pregnant? Not necessarily. But I do believe it is hugely important for a child to be raised in a stable two-parent home. This is just my opinion based on my own childhood. My parents never married (didn't even really have a romantic relationship after I was born), but they both decided that they wanted to raise me together. And I know that my life would've been very different had they decided otherwise.
Now, my parents were a bit older (26 and 38 ), so the situation was a little different. But throughout my teen years, so many of the people I knew came from dysfunctional families, and I could see the effect it had on them. That's not to say that there are no good single parents out there; there are lots! But ideally, I think having both parents raise the child together is what's best for the kid.
Just my thoughts. ^_^
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Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2007 2:49 pm
I know that for some reason it's stressful for kids to be raised seperately, but well, I never had any problems so I wonder why it's different for other people... I stopped spending time with my dad at age 4, visited him once when I was 7 and I haven't seen him since. I was never depressed because of it, but sometimes I wonder what it would have been like, I remember how I was starting to bond with him and recognize him as my dad. whee I wonder why I'm different?
One less parent means one less set of rules! 4laugh That's how I try to look at it! But it's more work for mom and one less set of memories... sweatdrop I don't know...
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Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2007 2:53 pm
Lorysa I know that for some reason it's stressful for kids to be raised seperately, but well, I never had any problems so I wonder why it's different for other people... I stopped spending time with my dad at age 4, visited him once when I was 7 and I haven't seen him since. I was never depressed because of it, but sometimes I wonder what it would have been like, I remember how I was starting to bond with him and recognize him as my dad. whee I wonder why I'm different?
One less parent means one less set of rules! xd That's how I look at it! Except it's more stress on mom and one less set of memories... sweatdrop Well it might be a bit different for you because your brothers are older....they can be fatherish figures in a weird sort of way.
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Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2007 2:55 pm
lymelady Lorysa I know that for some reason it's stressful for kids to be raised seperately, but well, I never had any problems so I wonder why it's different for other people... I stopped spending time with my dad at age 4, visited him once when I was 7 and I haven't seen him since. I was never depressed because of it, but sometimes I wonder what it would have been like, I remember how I was starting to bond with him and recognize him as my dad. whee I wonder why I'm different?
One less parent means one less set of rules! xd That's how I look at it! Except it's more stress on mom and one less set of memories... sweatdrop Well it might be a bit different for you because your brothers are older....they can be fatherish figures in a weird sort of way.
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Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2007 3:02 pm
Lorysa lymelady Lorysa I know that for some reason it's stressful for kids to be raised seperately, but well, I never had any problems so I wonder why it's different for other people... I stopped spending time with my dad at age 4, visited him once when I was 7 and I haven't seen him since. I was never depressed because of it, but sometimes I wonder what it would have been like, I remember how I was starting to bond with him and recognize him as my dad. whee I wonder why I'm different?
One less parent means one less set of rules! xd That's how I look at it! Except it's more stress on mom and one less set of memories... sweatdrop Well it might be a bit different for you because your brothers are older....they can be fatherish figures in a weird sort of way. Maybe it's just me, but it was important in my life. It taught me how men are supposed to treat me...and how I'm supposed to treat men.
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Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2007 3:17 pm
Lorysa But why is it important to have a father figure? sweatdrop I don't know how to explain it. But I do believe it's important. I think part of it is that, if I hadn't had a dad, I really would've taken advantage of having fewer rules. My mom's no pushover, but it was my dad who really kept my behavior in check. I was pretty well-behaved overall, and I think I would've been a good kid regardless; but I can see, looking back, that had I been raised by just my mom, I would've behaved differently. That's not true of all kids, obviously. But I think having two parents generally creates a more stable environment (assuming, of course, that these parents have a decent relationship).
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Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2007 5:59 pm
Beware the Jabberwock Tiger of the Fire I'm not liek that. My hunny-bunch, sugar plumb, snookems snookems, splor is good enough for me. I have no use for a dungeon pet *caughyetcough*
I'm on to you.It was the Wood Nymph's idea, I swear! gonk
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