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 Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 6:47 pm
rei_the_ancient Thanks Shinigami Whistle. ^^ To Crenn: I live in america, im american. *sigh* I can understand if you mom hates amrica becuase of teh crap america has probuly done. doesnt mean all us americans are proud of it though. So she shoulnt hate all americans if taht is the case. eh I'm not a hater of america. Why condemn a population if it was only a few who did something wrong? My mother compares me to her brothers and says I'm going to turn out like them (one of them is screwing a woman, having kids and the woman is literally just using him and my grandpa for money), except I'm not. I'm different. Anyway, my point is that just because someone belongs to a certian group and did something wrong, doesn't automatically mean that the rest of the group is like that.
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Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 6:50 pm
Crenn rei_the_ancient Thanks Shinigami Whistle. ^^ To Crenn: I live in america, im american. *sigh* I can understand if you mom hates amrica becuase of teh crap america has probuly done. doesnt mean all us americans are proud of it though. So she shoulnt hate all americans if taht is the case. eh I'm not a hater of america. Why condemn a population if it was only a few who did something wrong? My mother compares me to her brothers and says I'm going to turn out like them (one of them is screwing a woman, having kids and the woman is literally just using him and my grandpa for money), except I'm not. I'm different. Anyway, my point is that just because someone belongs to a certian group and did something wrong, doesn't automatically mean that the rest of the group is like that. exactly ^^ (please excuse my bad spelling, I am a bad speller.)
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Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 10:54 pm
Crenn rei_the_ancient Thanks Shinigami Whistle. ^^ To Crenn: I live in america, im american. *sigh* I can understand if you mom hates amrica becuase of teh crap america has probuly done. doesnt mean all us americans are proud of it though. So she shoulnt hate all americans if taht is the case. eh I'm not a hater of america. Why condemn a population if it was only a few who did something wrong? My mother compares me to her brothers and says I'm going to turn out like them (one of them is screwing a woman, having kids and the woman is literally just using him and my grandpa for money), except I'm not. I'm different. Anyway, my point is that just because someone belongs to a certian group and did something wrong, doesn't automatically mean that the rest of the group is like that. Ah Men to that. If you want my opinion, tell someone really close who you know will trust you and confide the secret that you have. A good friend decided to tell me first. Actually my reaction was "So?" He stated again his sexuality and I told him straight to his face . . . "No matter what happens your my friend." We still are to this day, and he's someone I look up to and admire. I hope you do have someone who can listen . . . if not you always have us here in the AFG!
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Posted: Tue Sep 12, 2006 6:00 am
Your sexuality is no one's business and you should not feel obligated tell anyone the kind of people you are attracted to, but you also should not hide it. You should feel comfortable with who you are and express yourself honestly, but there is a difference between being open and honest and needlessly bringing up subjects to tell people something they didn't ask about or is even their business.
There isn't any real reason to tell people you are attracted to both men and women, but by being true to yourself people will get the idea without you directly telling them. All I am saying is there is a much more subtle way of doing this and does help take some of the pressure off, the fear of what people might think is always there but it is a lot less when you casually bring up you swing both ways in normal conversation rather than going up to someone and telling them your sexual preference.
Personally, unless you are actually dating another guy and want people to know you have a boyfriend, what is the point in telling them anything at all? I know how it feels to hide the truth from people and how much better it is to be honest about who you are, but blurting out "mom, dad, I'm bi" is not that more tactful or mature way to go about it.
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Posted: Tue Sep 12, 2006 11:46 am
Just do what you're comfortable with. If you really feel that your parents or friends should know that you're bi, and you're comfortable about telling them, then by all means go for it. If the thought of them freaking out worries you, don't do it. Do what is best for you.
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Posted: Tue Sep 12, 2006 12:11 pm
*hugs* It's a tough thing to deal with, hun. My parents are both really open-minded folks, and not only accepted my choice to follow a Pagan spiritual path, but were the ones who originally inspired it. My grandma and most of my extended family, however, don't know that I'm Pagan, and I have no intention of telling any of them. If they find out on their own, that's fine, but it's been my experience that people see what they want to see.
I agree with the above post that you aren't obligated to tell anyone about what you are, but that you should remain true to yourself, but I also understand the need to tell someone what you are. I know how important it is to know that people truly know who you are, and don't have some false image of you in their minds. If you're torn as to whether or not you should tell your parents, think about it hard. Do they love you unconditionally? How set are they in their beliefs regarding homosexual relationships? Do they have the ability to be flexible enough to wrap their minds about this new facet of yours? If the answer is, yes, but only for your mom and not your dad--or vice versa--then only tell the parent you feel you can trust to accept you for who and what you are. Then you'll at least have your foot in the door.
I hope I've been of some help. You're in a difficult place right now, I know. I wish you the best.
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Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2006 3:05 pm
Thank you all, I told my friend Josh, he acted funny for a bit though. Then he said why dont I try nto to be Bi. Im like well you are or your not, you can't just become Bi or stop being Bi... sweatdrop Well he be the first person I told so far. Other then AFG >_< lol
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Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2006 6:29 pm
rei_the_ancient Thank you all, I told my friend Josh, he acted funny for a bit though. Then he said why dont I try nto to be Bi. Im like well you are or your not, you can't just become Bi or stop being Bi... sweatdrop Well he be the first person I told so far. Other then AFG >_< lol Hey, grats! It's kind of nice to get it off your shoulders to someone else, isn't it? Gl!
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Posted: Thu Sep 14, 2006 10:07 pm
Try not to be bi? >.<
Reminds me of the line from X-Men: "Have you tried...not being a mutant?"
It's a genetic predisposition. You can no more try to not be bi, straight, gay, asexual than you can try not to be caucasion, Chinese, tall, short, fair skin, naturally tanned, etc etc.... *remembers she's in rant mode because of the heat and shuts up*
x_x
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Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 11:37 am
Rawr, ok. I have herd of guys like this before. I just say that you don't tell any one. I mean, you lean towards females, so there is not really any reason to flaunt that you like men as well. And if you ever find a girl you want to be with the rest of you life you can tell her. I am sure that she will not care. I mean, that would mean you two could watch something and you can tease her about how Kevin Costers butt if better than hers and stuff and just play around with it. But since you more than likely will not wind up with a male life partner I just suggest that you stay in the closet ^-^
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Posted: Mon Sep 18, 2006 2:08 pm
Well I lean more towards girls yes, But, it seems pretty close to 50/50 to me... O.o, I guess its mroe that I try to lean more to girls. I fthat makes since. Any ways, I have told my mom, and she actully didn't care, It wasn't new to her i guess >_<, She is glad that I told her though. I actully told her and my uncle Hal at teh same time, that I was Bi. I just wanted to get it out in teh open was all. Thanks everyone for helping me. I just didn't want to feel like always keeping the Bi part of me secret, it just bugged me feeling like I couldn't tel any one. My friend Josh has accepted it, My mom and my uncle now know. Ill never tell my Dad though, he wouldn't understand, and I feel that would be best for that one. But wanted to make sure I thanked you all for your suport. ^_^
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Posted: Mon Sep 18, 2006 7:34 pm
well, truthfully you dont have to tell them now, but you do have to tell them sonner or later.
what happens if you get into a serious relationship with a guy? its not nice to keep a serious relationship like that from your folks, plus you would owe it to them, but dont do it untill your comfortable with it, like other people have said, think about your parents before hand, whats the worst that can happen, what about them leads you to believe that they'll react harshly, etc.
but dont leave it to long or else they might find out and may drag it out of you like mine did, and thats not nice at all, believe me.
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Posted: Mon Sep 18, 2006 8:04 pm
If you read my last post I said I told my mom already >_<
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Posted: Wed Sep 20, 2006 11:37 am
Let me say this: If you really don't care what your parents think, then just tell them. But if you do care, don't tell them.
I told my mom and she was cool with it until I got a boyfriend and then she started bitching at me for "it not being right".
'eh I called her a gay basher.
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Posted: Thu Sep 21, 2006 12:46 am
Yah, well It try to be honest with my friends and my parents. Although there are things I will never tel my Dad cause he will never understand, but mom is and has always been understanding about most things. Any ways, I tol her, and my Uncle Hal (cause he was around when I told my mom >_<)
As far as hat side I lean on, well depends on how you look at it. I say I lean more towards girls, but thats becuase I tryed to lean my slef moe towards girls, cause if I had a relationship, it would be more easyer for me to tell my parents that I am with a girl rather then telling them I am Bi and am with a guy. i honestly ruey dont know what side I truely lean towards as far as being Bi goes.
Does any of this make since. I confuse my self sometimes >_<
I updated my signature, my wolf pic looks so awsome! That would be me, Yugo the wolf. Mwhahaha :3
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