Major news from the Dark Syndicate
We turned one! Unfortunately, due to work I missed the party icon_crying.gif *dodges potential boots and bottles thrown at him* The good, well not old, since we're only one, guild has seen some strange things happening, lots of laughs, tears, frustration, and amazing members. But we made it, with over 80,000 posts and counting. Those that showed up yesterday got to eat pizza, pies, cookies, cupcakes, pudding cups, as well as have any drink anything they wanted, with Margaritas and Smirnoff ruling the party. Murder was DJ and Ry was hitting on Dante! Get your own sexy reporter Ry! I saw him first! Luckily for Dante, Tuesday saved him by stealing him from Ry. I just hope she plans on giving him back to me. Fallen made a short speech, thanking all of those who showed up, as well as all the members who gave the guild a chance and stuck around, because as Fallen said they guild wouldn't be what it is without you guys. Congrats to everyone who made it, and as far as those who haven't, Ry's super cat will probably ******** them up. Oddly enough, among those missing from the party, was Kessar herself. She did not show till way later that evening, claiming that she was kidnapped for the weekend. Is it just me, or Fallen does not look happy? Happy Belated Birthday DS, one year passed, and hopefully man more to come.
I just took a gander at the post count, out of curiosity. My findings were remarkable! Kessar is being out posted by her own children! Gamer has 7126, Grim 8482, and Kessar is at 7114. Even though she was gone, her children picked up her slack and quickly started posting and entertaining the Mistresses and minions. I wonder if they'll be able to keep it up or if Lady Kessar will try and surpass them. Kessar had this to say, "Of course I'm going to beat them! I will post until my fingers cramp up and start bleeding from the tips. If desperate measures come to it, I'll tie those children up just so I can!" I haven't been able to track the children down. Once I do, hopefully they'll have something to say to the press.
Minor news from the Dark Syndicate
Mistress Fallen is at it again! This time, she's trying to find out who's better! Pirates or Ninjas? Some people say ninjas, other say pirates. However Sin says hitmen should win. Kessar, she doesn't know so she has kidnapped a female pirate and a female ninja and forcing them to battle it out to show her who's better...
The Evil School is being reconstructed! Get your back packs ready and your thinking caps on! Its time for you to go back to school to learn your evil subjects...or even teach them.
Grim has claimed Neko as his naughty kitty. One more kitty in the guild that still needs a home. Who will claim Katie and will she accept?
Kessar has a new shiney poking stick and it is said that she has an exploding button. Where is Lady Kessar when we need to test this theory?
Gamer has a fortress and hides his treasure in his sewer systems. Camo crawls into the system to steal Gamer's treasure. Is Camo secretly rooting for the pirates?
Grim chains and cages Kessar, grounding her for hiding in his crawl spaces. She is yelling for help and freedom.
Fallen is spying on Tuesday trying to find her secret pudding cup stash. However, we have Tuesday stealing Fallen in Shin's Lair...
In the Newbie/Confused office, we have a several warnings about various minions. We also have the Guild Glossary. Check them out. I'm sure you'll be giggle fitting for quite some time after reading them.
Just in: Kessar wants you to pm her if you have any words that should be added to this glossary and their definitions.
There's a new show! The What If Talk Show hosted by Lady Kessar herself. Go check it out in the one and only TDS TV. Ry claims it might be more awesome than his show. Fallen claims this is blasphemy and nothing could be more awesome that Ry's Break the Walls Down.
Warning: We all know what happens when Kessar becomes drunk. Grim is curious what happens when the other two mistresses become intoxicated. Fallen claims she chases people with knives. Raien, we still don't know...
Grim wants a sister. He has tossed up several ideas. He suggested Kessar adopted Fallen as her daughter. He also said that he plans on turning Gamer into a girl by chopping his "winky" off and for Risae's sake, jarring it. Gamer, if you see Grim, I would either run or have your arrows ready to strike.
Rumors say that Kessar causes heart burn. Does anyone wish to test this theory?
Kessar's infamous taco bag has been revealed! In it, she's been carrying around her mental papers. From these mental papers we learn that Kessar has seen the little white men. While she was there, her brother Satan would rape her in the evenings. Eventually she got pregnant...without alcohol icon_eek.gif ! We also learn, this child is our very own Cuddler. Another happy reunion in the guild.
This just in, Kessar has told me that she was chasing Tuesday with those three items because she wishes to make Tuesday her pet.
Kessar starts chasing after Tuesday with a net, collar and a leash. Grim swings in as Tarzan to save Tuesday from Kessar. The question is what does Kessar want to do to Tuesday with those items?
Kessar and Murder suggest Fallen takes a short break to recharge some. Fallen is actually thinking about it. If she does take this break, what will happen to the guild? Will Mistress Fallen come back to a pile of rubble or will she come back to a spotless, well tamed minions? Only time will tell!
Discussion whether or not Ry and Eitel could have sex with all that fur and hairy legs causes Fallen to throw out a question. Will 3 people dare her to make an R rated story about that? She's been dared! Ry, Murder and Gamer have dared her! Either get your reading glasses ready or gauge your eyes out, but its coming out eventually either way.
An Unknow Co-Host has appeared to help Fallen with announcements. Is it a man? Is it a woman? Is it a string puppet controlled by a T-rex? No one knows! And Fallen isn't telling. Damn that evil woman.
Fallen complains of having terrible kids. Camo suggests drugging Eitel, but Kaito steals the needle. Frustrated Fallen starts reading "101 Ways to disown your children", that doesn't look so good....
New random event planned, Sleep Over! Finally a chance for everyone to see Camo's sexy legs again xD But really, I wanna check out Dante's a** *shifty eyes*
Camo wants to make a Gamer soup, Gamer refuses to be cooked by Camo and Grim. Kessar decides she wants a Grim soup and proceeds to prepare to cook her son. I think she just wants to get rid of him...
Camo, Murder and Gamer are playing poker. No, not strip poker, although that would be interesting. It is unconfirmed whether Camo was cheating.
Camo has a snake named Harold. Fallen suggests snake breeding. 200 foot snake versus Harold........it was nice knowing you Harold.
Rumors have it that Murder took Grim back. Neither side confirms or denies. Either way, congrats!
Kessar wants the minions meat! She's trying to make Minion Soup. In the process, she told Haru and Ry that she wanted their meat. Is she drunk again?
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!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! !!!!!!
yeah....
its been fine... just the usually boring stuff.... school ... -_-
woot!!! ^-^