Birthday: 05/26
Remind me to update my interests.
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HORNK! GASPLUSH! BAKLOOIE! Terrible sounds poured from the Oddisee as Emily frantically pushed buttons and pulled levers, trying to find out what had gone so horribly wrong. She was in the final stages of a very important experiment to create a brand-new type of running hamster. But unfortunately, it looked like she had created a hellish mutant greedy dog, instead!
“I don’t get it,” Emily said out loud, while her faithful lab assistant and cat friend Mystery listened. “All I did was take some DNA from my arm, add a little poop and a cup of grape soda (you know, the stuff beyonce drinks?) and mix it all in a singed. My data shows that this should work! Mystery, where did I go wrong?”
Mystery singed loudly, then meowed into the microphone of the Oddisee. Her thoughts were translated on the screen: “do something with your breath!! I mean, normally you’re pretty smart for a human, but today you acted like a big brittany spears. What made you think you should get DNA from your arm? It should have come from your toes! Also, I really think you should have used medicine instead of poop - it ALWAYS makes my experiments much more smart! And finally – I recommend urine instead of grape soda. I don’t care if beyonce drinks a gallon of that stuff a day, it just doesn’t make a good running hamster!”
Emily slapped her fingers and sighed. “You’re right, Mystery. You’re always right.” Then, turning some dials and fiddling with some cell phone, she tried to end the experiment. But – FRELKUM FRECKLES!!-- it was TOO LATE! The hellish mutant greedy dog had escaped, and was running around the lab, breaking jet pack everywhere. The last thing Emily saw was its huge, tweezers mouth opening wide – and then, the total darkness of the inside of its telescope.
“HELP! MYSTERY! GET ME OUT OF HERE!” she yelled as loudly as she could.
But all she could hear, from her prison inside the monster, was the sound of one cat laughing...