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What do you think?
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Yugi looked up at Yami. "I guess...I guess you have to go now, huh Yami?" The pharaoh nodded sadly and looked over to all thier friends. "Though...I wish I could stay..." He looked at Te'a and a tear fell from his crimson eyes. Yugi's heart broke. He'd always loved Yami, ever since he had first solved the puzzle. But he knew Yami would never return his feelings. He tried not to break down crying as he asked, "Y-you want to stay Yami?" He nodded. "Yeah..." Marik shook his head sadly. "Someone must go through the doorway. The Gods need someone. And that someone is you Yami...Yugi won the duel...you have to go." The pharaoh nodded and was about to enter the doorway when Yugi pushed him to the ground. "Yugi?!" Everyone gasped and Joey and Tristan went over to Yami. Yugi had tears flowing from his face. "Yugi? Wha-" "Pharaoh! I know I can't have your heart! But I can give you life!" With that, Yugi ran into the doorway and screamed to the gods...
Oh gods of Egypt!
Hear my crys!
Take me instead!
So that I may die!
Take me instead!
This is my plea!
Take me instead!
So Yami can be free!!For a moment, nothing happened. Then a voice, deep with power and age, bellowed...
So you wish it!
So shall it be!!!!
So, as tearful friends watched, Yugi was sucked into the portal, wispering with his final breath, "Now...you can live...Yami..." Then the doorway shut with a loud THUD! No one moved. Yami just sat there, trying to take in what had just happened. Suddenly, the voice bellowed...
From this day on, Atemu!
You shall be mortal!
Your host body has taken your place in the afterlife so that you may live.
Use the time you now have!
Then, Yami sucked in a breath. Not a fake breath the spirit had for so long lived by, but an actual, oxygen filled breath! Yami smiled wide but then remembered that Yugi was gone. He fell to the alter crying. Everyone (save for Te'a *coughs* b***h. *coughs*) else was crying too. Kaiba was holding Joey, Bakura was holding Ryou and Tristan, Duke, Mai, Marik, Ishizu, and Shadi were all just quietly crying. Yami pounded a fist on the alter. 'Aibou...WHY?! The only reason I wanted to stay was because of you!'
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Bad. I know! crying But if you could PM me some tips, then maybe I could actually make a plot for this story. I'm also trying to do an element story. PM me to tell me what you think! Be nice!

thats so cute!! heart wish i could write my stories like that, but they come out like crap. i dont have any ideas but its really cute.

I love this blaugh biggrin smile xd 3nodding
I want to read the next part crying

I like the premise; it's original in that it has Yugi go through the door and Yami stay, rather than the "happily ever after". I do have a few suggestions, though.
It is a bit too short. Look for places where you could add some description. Add a little description of the setting into the beginning.
Secondly, though I appreciate the poetry of what Yugi says to the gods, it seems out of character for him to be so poetic. He's very emotional at that moment and what he says is more likely to come out broken up and desperate.
Also, a pet peeve of mine is using onomatopeia in caps (THUD!) and adding extra comments in parantheses, but that's just my opinion and is just a creative difference.
This really is a very good start, and I would love to see what happens next. That is, if you're writing more. You are, right? Right? heart

Okay! Chapter two is up. Just look for the big letters saying, "PLEASE READ FOR FANFICTION!!!!!!!" ^^ See ya!