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Where, exactly, had he gone wrong? Robert thought he was sure of himself and all he stood for when he'd first walked into that room filled with other apprentice knights. Yet with each passing moment, he felt everything slowly chipping away. He did not know what would be left.

The plains ahead were empty and quiet. He rode Galaxy with a slow gait, as his thoughts wandered to the woman that made him question everything. She wanted to join him on his journeys, even though there was nothing for her to obtain. She wanted to come with him and risk her own sickness, her own life, not because she wanted to be with him - no, he told himself. He had to push down that little bubble of hope he felt when he realized how hard she'd been fighting to join him on his journey. It was not because she wanted to be with him. This was some insane battle she was waging against the constraints placed upon her.

And he was the first victim in that battle, laid low by her sudden outrage. She wanted to join him because it was her right as a knight, that was all.

He didn't know if he was ready for all of this.

He dismounted from the horse to check on the satchel of food left behind by a traveler. Everything seemed fresh, untouched, and unspoiled. He attached the satchel to Galaxy's saddle, and returned to his place on her back. If the journey was going to be a long one, it would only be because he needed the time to think. This influx food gave him that option, if he chose to use it.

Step Two

Then, what? What choice left did he have? If he couldn't stomach the idea of leaving her, and he wasn't sure he could understand her, what could he do? Was he doomed to try and lure her back to his intentions, of a wife at her husband's feet, never to fulfill her own dream? Even that disgusted him now - and it never had before! There, that was progress, wasn't it?

"If I give her the chance to be who she wants, but I never leave her side - can it be as simple as that?" He spoke aloud, making Galaxy's ear turn towards him in response. "Even if I don't understand it? If I don't truly believe in it? Or is that just a bond built on lies?"

She would have to know, without a doubt, that her philosophies were not necessarily his. She would have to understand that he wanted her to have everything she asked for, but that did not necessarily mean he agreed with everything. Then, could he stand by her; support her; trust her, perhaps even love her, in time?

It was shaky, but it was a start.

"Time." He muttered, making Galaxy's ear flicker again. "What I'm asking for, is time. Perhaps a lifetime. Perhaps less. If I can respect her wishes, without understanding them, I would not be a burden to her goals. What do you think, Galaxy? Is it enough?"

The horse whinnied - the first noise she'd made all day. He took it as a good sign.

"Then I'll have to give it a shot." Because staying away from her, he quickly realized, would be a fate worse than death.

"MILDRED!" He called out, shouting into the open air. "I WILL RETURN!"

But the avalanche that almost knocked him off of the mountain had other plans. When he recovered enough to make it up the mountain, and retrieved his prize, he found more joy in the idea of galloping at full speed back to the castle, than actually claiming this victory. He would return, and he would find her.

And he would try. That was all he could do, and it had to be enough.

Step Four