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 Posted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 10:26 am
Prologue
Speed was a necessity, and I needed it. If there was a god of speed, I would have prayed to it, and if there was a time when I thought I needed speed, it was nothing in comparison to this hour. There was no hope for me, if I couldn’t obtain it, and I would have never succeeded in getting so far without it. Speed was a necessity, and I needed it now more than ever.
My stolen mount didn’t seem full of youthful vigor, nor did my mind spin with incredible plans for escape. Three days and three nights of running from royal knights, who changed shifts and horses every hour did absolutely nothing to awaken my thoughts. Each time I tried to conjure an escape; the attempt was more feeble than the last.
My mind might have been inactive—or at least to the point where believing what it told me was more than foolish--but my body certainly was not. The aches in my legs never dulled, and my head throbbed rhythmically to the heavy pounding of my horse’s hooves. It neck was slick with sweat, and its head sank closer to the ground every stride in a silent protest.
We were both tired, but there was nothing I could do about it.
I swore to myself. If I hadn’t taken that assignment, if I had only laughed in his face when my teacher asked my to steal the most prized possession in all of Semelia…There were so many ‘ifs’ that it didn’t matter any more. If I had only came a few minuets later, if it hadn’t been at the changing of the guard. I sighed. But at least I had my prize, wrapped in black silk, clutched to my chest. And it would finally find its way into the palms of the one man who could use its powers for something more than an apocalypse. My should-have-been father, the master assassin, my teacher called Eringel.
The hoofbeats behind me were growing louder, and my heart sped faster than the jolting pace of my mount. The guards would soon be upon me, but there were only five miles to the next village. There I could steal another horse, and ride away. But I knew I was already captured, and the knights could take as long as they wanted, and I’d still not make it in time. Not unless the sentries were dead drunk or really dead.
It was a race for more than survival.
So, would you keep reading? Please reveiw!
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Posted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 12:18 pm
Well, I want to read more, I'll say that much.
I have one comment though. Try to find a synonym for speed. It might flow better if you don't use the same word over and over again in that first paragraph.
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Posted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 12:36 pm
I liked this a lot! More please?
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Posted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 2:31 pm
I was wodering if I wrote speed too much...
thank you for the comments, I love them!
I may post the first chapter in a little while...
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Posted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 3:26 pm
I like it, though as was already said, find a synonym for speed.
I would enjoy reading more. 3nodding
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Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 3:59 pm
I dono, repetition of a single word can work in the context of a monologue. Not everyone thinks like a writer you know. ^_^
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Posted: Mon Jun 25, 2007 10:45 am
Hey, I really do love the prologue! Could you please post more? This is really intresting so far, lol. ^-^
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Posted: Sat Jul 21, 2007 6:26 pm
Good job! I would definitely use a synonym for speed, and not because I didn't like the repetition, but it brought to mind a more modern day idea of what you need speed for; street races, hot rods, things like that.
I'm interested to see the rest!
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