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 Posted: Mon Sep 18, 2006 1:41 am
So today, a customer faxed through a work request... He had apparantly been told to attention it to Grace. Except that instead of writing it at the top like a normal person, genius writes it on a post-it-note, sticks that on top if the work request & then faxes it through. So the fax arrives, a chunk of semi-important information is missing & in its place is a square of white with "Attention Grace" in the middle. We then had to forward that to the distributor. Who now probably thinks we're al retarded... I was very tempted to cover the blank space with a post-it-note that read "The customer did this, not us", but we didn't think they'd believe us.
I thought it was so funny I stuck it on the wall of my desk with another post-it-note that reads "This is what happens when you don't think about what you're doing..."
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Posted: Thu Oct 05, 2006 11:06 pm
Here's an order I got half an hour before the store closed:
3 large pan pepperoni
9 medium pan pepperoni
12 medium wings (10) = 120 medium wings
Wow. Some party no?
Um... THIS WAS TO BE DELIVERED TO A HOTEL ROOM!
Came out to about $120 or more. The delivery guy got $2 in tips.
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Posted: Wed Oct 11, 2006 7:06 am
I work at two places: Griffith's (a jeweler's) and Wal-Mart (the "We're going to fsck you over and you can't do a damn thing about it" mart). I'm Assistant manager at Wal-mart (a fluke, actually..) and I'm just the counter dude at Griffith's.
Anyway, one day at wal-mart, I have five minutes left before I can clock out. So I'm trying to look like I'm working when I'm actually trying to find the 3 Musketeer's funsize bags. (I wanted candy.. gonk ) I finally find the aisle, and some short fat guy walks up to me and says the exact following:
Dude: Where d'ya keep the plain straws?
Me: Do you mean the straws without colored stripes, sir?
Dude: Yeah, yeah, sure. Where are they?
(Meanwhile I'm remembering that the straws are with the cups.)
Me: I believe (leaning and pointing towards the plastic plates and cups aisle) they're in aisle 7, sir.
Dude: Yeah, yeah.
He had really stinky breath too.. yeck.
And I grab my candy and run towards the layaway department, and go in the back and clock out. I come out, go up front, say "hi" to the loud new jewish chick, pay for my candy, and I'm about to walk out when the short fat guy runs, puffing, up to me...
Dude: I found the straws, yeah.
Me: That's nice, sir. (nodnod)
Dude: Where d'ya keep them red plastic cups?
Duuur?! WTF?! God..
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Posted: Mon Oct 30, 2006 7:49 pm
I shall title this one: The Lightbulb License
Last friday my manager sent me to buy lightbulbs so I can change out the burnt out ones. So I get two packs of four (we had seven lightbulbs to change) and give her the change. She was shocked - it cost just over $30.
Anyway, I was on the third last lightbulb and having troubles getting it out. I eventually did and found the problem - it was just hanging from the wires. So I tried to hook 'em back on... but the wires touched. Sparks + *pop* = lights out (just the one section). I was then told to leave that one alone, someone'll come in the morning to fix it. So after turning the lights back on, I went onto the next one. Next thing I know I hear "Pistil, are you licensed to do that?" I look down from my perch to see a customer looking back up at me. He lifts his cap, which I then read. "Sparky's electric" stare So I said, "I think so... but I shorted the breaker by touching the wires to that one over there." He ignored me, took his pizzas, and left.
HAHAHAHAHA What a funny joke he said! rofl ... but seriously, what an idiot. A license to change lightbulbs? PAH!
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Posted: Tue Oct 31, 2006 11:36 pm
The past couple of days have brought up the topic of amusing names (usually with customers) a couple of times.
Some of our customers include Whispering Wind & Maddog (Can't remember his last name, but apparantly he sounded like a SA bikie). One of the girls mentioned her friend who had basically divorced himself from his family & changed his last name to Suede. All his friends then called him "the Suede", until one day a group of friends dared/paid him $500 to change his first name to "The". So now his legal name is The Suede.
But the best story ever has to be one that a new person to the team (who's being trained by me, poor her, I know!) who used to work for the Metlink (Melbourne public transport) call centre told me. It was about a guy who was pretty much a regular (as he traveled on the V Line nearly every day going into the city for interviews) who changed his name. His mum (who apparantly didn't approve of the name change) used to book the tickets over the phone with her credit card.
Apparantly every call with her ended up going like this:
Metlink operator: "... and what is the name of the person who will be travelling?"
Guy's mother: "*SIGH* Supreme Commander Starpower."
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Posted: Mon Dec 04, 2006 9:10 pm
That reminds me! I was looking at some application forms with another manager a few weeks back & we came accross one from a girl named Ashitti Barthwall, now say it out loud...
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 9:12 pm
OMG! Proof of Supreme Commander Starpower!!!!
Check out this news article from Alice Springs! (Near the bottom of the first article)
And again! Apparantly he's a refugee activist...
I'd've thought there's be more... but 2 different newspaper articles about 2 different events...
LOL @ that name Angelz! Did you hire them?
There's an Ashley Dickman at my work... so when we recieve "Barries" (sort of like email work requests... how everyone asks people from other departments to do jobs at our work) from him they say they're from "adickman"... I always find that one amusing...
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 10:04 pm
So I work at a library, and someone walked in and asked if we have books. stare As if that wasn't enough, he proceeded to ask how much we charged for the rental of said books.
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 10:05 pm
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Posted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 10:06 pm
Well, what was worse was this one lady who was trying to use her dead sister's library card.
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Posted: Wed Dec 06, 2006 9:40 pm
@JewelsSparkle, no we didn;t hire her, I think she was too old? Not sure.
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Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2006 4:59 pm
Well like many other establishment we have a box of york peppermint patties sitting on our front counter. Anyway yeterday this older fellow came in and aked how much they are even though it's clearly marked on a cup that is purched upon the box reading ten cents for yorks. Anyway He tosses four of them onto the counter and says. "I love yorks i nthis half yelling voice i almost lost it right there. Anyway I say that'll be 40 cents. what does he do? He passes me a Visa card...He charges 40 god damn cents. I was rolling after he left. He really must loves yorks to pay interet on them.
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Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2006 11:14 am
Since I work in a survey call centre, I don't precicely have customers - I randomly call people. So, have a random "grr! argh!" moment.
Me: "Hi, I'm Lyssa calling on behalf of so-and-so, and I'd like to ask someone in your household a few questions."
Resp.: "Get a real job, you piece of--"
Me: "EXCUSE me sir, but what is the letter of two evils; someone calling to ask you for YOUR opinion, or that someone living off of your tax dollars via welfare?"
He did the survey. Not that it was all that long in the first place (10 min), but y'know. Technically, I could get fired for that, but hey, it worked. heart
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Posted: Fri Dec 15, 2006 7:47 am
UnseelieSidhe Since I work in a survey call centre, I don't precicely have customers - I randomly call people. So, have a random "grr! argh!" moment.
Me: "Hi, I'm Lyssa calling on behalf of so-and-so, and I'd like to ask someone in your household a few questions."
Resp.: "Get a real job, you piece of--"
Me: "EXCUSE me sir, but what is the letter of two evils; someone calling to ask you for YOUR opinion, or that someone living off of your tax dollars via welfare?"
He did the survey. Not that it was all that long in the first place (10 min), but y'know. Technically, I could get fired for that, but hey, it worked. heart
Also I found out today that apparantly Whispering Wind is a real b***h! One of the girls in the team-I-sit-with-that-isn't-actually-my-team had to deal with her not long ago. So we've decided she must've had pre-hippy parents (she's in her 50s I think), rather than her changing her name because she was a hippy. A few people at my work have wondered about that & if she's nasty to someone trying to help her, she can't be hippy enough to change her name to that... so her parents were hippies that were 10 years too early!
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Posted: Sun Dec 31, 2006 2:19 pm
ok, yesterday at work someone parked in the fire lane. so, i made the call that said "Will the customer who owns a red ford F150 with license plate XXXXXXXXXX please move it from the fire lane or it will be towed." Moments later, some redneck loser comes up to the CSM (who happened to be right beside me) and starts biting her head off, saying stuff like "I've got permission from the manager to park there" and all this other BS. He then proceeded back into the store to finish shopping.
and i proceeded to call the police and a towing company. who got to his car before he got to the checkout counters.
he came through my line while i was talking to the same csm he cussed out, and our discussion involved him and the difference between stupid and ignorant. And then the police came in and he cussed them out when they told us that the vehicle was removed from our property.
It made my birthday, i tell you that much
p.s. the difference is that stupid people don't know they're stupid. ignorant people choose to be stupid.
United States Public Health mandates that NO ONE may park in the fire lane except for city health officials (firemen, ambulance drivers, police. that's it)
and if our manager did give him permission, then we can be fined for a few thousand dollars.
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