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So, this is where I try to get semi-deep/philosophical or at least sound like it because I'm semi drunk.

It's 5:31 in the morning, and everything is dark, it seems like the world which I live in, the space around me is completely dead except for me awake and listening to trance.

I almost have an epipheny, where the entire universe opens up to me and I see the entire truth of it all, but not quite.

I'm trying to stay up and watch the sunrise, see the world around me glow, watch something which gives us life blossom over the sky into its full majesty but I will probably fail at this, who knows. I might post later if I do succeed, if I don't, I might have succeeded I might have failed who knows.

I'm over whelmed with this sense of nostalgia as I sit here in my room listening to trance thump out of my speakers, this nostalgia of things that where, things that are, and things that are to be. Now I use nostalgia as a rush of good feelings, ones that make you think and sigh deep down inside and put this stupid silly little smile on your face and make your eyes sparkle. These thoughts I have are not very important, but very important at the same time. How can this be? Well it's simple: They're my thoughts, so they might not be important to you but are to me.

I was just hanging out with my friends, and listening to one of my friend's girlfriends go on and on about relationships, about having sex, and all this other s**t and I thought: What am I missing. A lot is the answer as for some reason I have not actually tried to find one, just an endless string of one-night stands, ******** buddies and friends with benefits. Why? Because it seems like a huge plunge in life, like striking out into the ocean on a ******** canoe and waiting to get picked up by an ocean liner, but I digress.

Right now I truthfully contemplate many things, the dancing all night at a rave, the tribal, base, instinctual feel of it all. The thudding music, the sweat clinging to me and as soon as I step outside how much satisfaction a tiny breeze will give me. The soreness of my limps the next day, knowing that I just spent an entire night dancing, but it's a good sore, a sore that makes you know youdid something besides s**t. The fuzzy-ness of my head from the thudding music, alcohol, or dare I say it drugs.

Right now I sit in a chair, smoking a cigarette indoors god forbid if my house-mate finds out I'm doing it. My smoke detector lays on my coffee table like some sacrificial victim with its heart - batteries - torn out of it and laying next to it. The silence beyond my music would surely overwhelm me, and in ways I'm scared to venture outside of my sanctury - my room. My house is quiet, dead quiet if not for my music. d**k Clarke said that music is the soundtrack of our lives, and how true is this? I remember when Le Thief or was it Mirrorite posted up a thread dedicated to this: If we could pick songs to our soundtrack for certain situations in our life, what would those tracks be? I find it interesting, the way people chose music to suit their needs, suit their demeanor, suit their personality, suit their situation.

We're all bound here by that simple fact: of music. How can such a great group of people be bound together, through a website, through some silly forums with anime-ish avatars and all this s**t rise above it all to group together - band together I might dare say - for one simple thing: music.

We could always go into the intricies of music, but why ruin it? Why should we trivialize our connection through all this talk of "music makes you feel this way, and this way and this." Why not simplify it to: Music makes you feel good. Like chefs in a kitchen, or patrons at a restuarent we come to feed on it, and create it. I challenge you to walk down a busy street one day and not find music, I do every day. Haha, ******** I have no idea where I'm going with this.

I find it in some ways strange how I started this. I read the complaints on the electronica forum from a group of people and never would have imagined it would grow to be this big. I asked Bramd (whever he is and I hope he is doing well) for some gold to start this guild; I had no idea what to call it. I'm ashamed to admit I forgot who came up with the idea for it, but I know I talked to some of the original members about this place before I even started it.

Like venturing into the unknown, like taking that canoe out into the ocean and waiting to be picked up by the steam ship I decided to say "******** it all," to every doubt in my mind and create this and look at it now. A core group of people who are - as aforementioned - bound together by the love of something as simple as music. Music that can inspire a wide range of feelings inside of one person. Nostalgia, hate, love, fear, joy, pleasure, curiosity, the list goes on and grows more numerous.

I suppose that I'm turning this into another "thank you" thread, the ones that I have made so many of to you guys, and truely I do wish to say thank you, and wish that you guys never forget that this place is as much yours as it is mine. Even more so, I wish for it to be yours rather than mine, because I didn't create it for myself, I created it for everybody. Everybody who wished to take a refuge from everything, to discuss whatever they wanted, to talk with like-minded people, to chill. So, in those respects I say thank you.

Well, I think that's almost about enough for my incoherent ramblings and random thoughts, I had no center idea when I started this post, and I have no center idea when I finished. Perhaps this is a good thing, no?

As cheesy as it sounds, the only way that I can think of ending this post is simply with the old catch phrase, our old motto, one that hopefully never will die because of its pure and simply genious. Peace, Love, Unity and Respect. These four letters should call to everyone, regardless of how jaded they are in the simplicity of how they are presented to an entire scene, a global movement. Four simply words that a person in America, Russia, Japan, South Africa, New Zealand, Australia, and everywhere can adhere by. I wish you all peace, I love you all, I'm glad for our unity, and I respect you all.

**edit**

Made it smile and it was worth it.

Thanks Psychosis.

Up until a year ago. I had no music I listened to. At all.
I didn't know of Electronic music. I didn't fit in.
I thought there was something wrong with me. No matter what I listened to, it sounded like crap to me. I was frustraited for the longest time. But now that I listen to music, and now that I feel like I fit a little group. I don't feel so different. So alone.

I just saw Stanley Kubrick's Full Metal Jacket for the first time.

The American military are a bunch of mind-controlling asshats.

A very nice post Psychosis smile


On a unrelated note:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=3tkBYo3A3DY&mode=related&search=
http://youtube.com/watch?v=9g_1iDH0cbo

I lol'd... whee

I need to learn that Altoid Sours do not constitute actual food.

Getting dressed while listening to buttrock neurotrance is oddly disconcerting.

Is it just me or does that sound like the title of a porno? Specifically, a gay porno?

It's what they call a "Psychological thriller", and it's a good one too. Gay porno is not that disturbing in comparsion, I think.