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We all have our favorite cereal box characters its just finding out what your into ... First we have Lucky from "Lucky Charms" ok he is a perfect example kids always trying to get his "Lucky Charms" which in turn I think it means his stash come on he's a little leprachan.. and he is Irish. So you know he must have a police record ive done some research and I have found that he has alot of counts of Public Intoxication,Domestic Violence , and about three counts of Child Abuse so by all mean if you want to grow up being a drunk then by all means hes your Character.

Next we have "Trix The Rabbit" in my eyes he is a Clipto and a Stalker why the hell is he always around kids? Why is he always around when kids are eating some sort of trix product ? in my research I have found some things that the Rabbit tryed keeping in the closet he was arrested for Stalking a kid to some pretty horrible things the kid ate Trix products like every day always pushing the rabbit away and one day the Rabbit took the kids dog and cut its head off leaving it on the boys door step with a note that read " You little b*****d I tried being your friend but no you didnt want that, So if I cant be your friend no one will " he was arrested later that afternoon.

Next we come to the character " Boo Berry " one of my favorites that s**t is delicious !!!! But the story behind him isnt so great.... Boo Berry started out as a innocent Child named Marcus Berry. He was asked by his mom to go to the market and get some Cereal, his mother always told him to look both ways before crossing the street as he stepped out into the street the town drunk came up in his car swerving and plowing into poor Marcus Berry hitting him and killing him instantly. His ghost however never went to the otherside, though seeing that he was in limbo he had unfinished business to attend to. he was sent out to make cereal so little Marcus Berry started his own cereal factory to try and give his mother the cereal he never brought back.

Finally we come to Cap'n Crunch ohhh my the worst of the worst this poor b*****d had everything that was brought in by a colombian drug lord the Cap'n spent his days smuggling drugs back and forth from the ocean anyone getting in his way he slaughtered them like a pig. One day they caught a worker having a little bit of a private party with cocaine the Cap'n heard about this and went to the man tied him down and let loose a snake which slithered down his pants while the cap'n took a set of plyers and pulled his fingernails out from his fingers and then gutted him then threw him over board feeding him to the sharks. then as they got close to the drop off zone the U.S CoastGuard intercepted them and got into a large gun battle which sadly took the life of the Ol Cap'n respect was in order for the cap'n so all his smuggling buddies took took him to Guatonimo Bay were his body was buried.....

I know LMMFAO one of my buds on yahoo sent it to me I figured I would post it up and share the humorness

Q: What do you call the foreskin on a f**?

A: A Mud Flap

Q: What do Rednecks do for Halloween?

A: Pump kin

Jesus cures not so many people

A crippled man hobbles into a bar on his crutches and sat down, he looked to the end of the bar and was shocked "say, is that Jesus over there?" he asked the bartender
"yep." the bartender replied "well give him a drink on me " said the disabled man

A man with a huge hump on his back walked into the bar and sat down he asked the bartender the same question and also bought the savior a round.

Soon, a construction worker sauntered in. made the same query and bought the messiah another drink.

Jesus finished his libations, walked to the and touched him the invalid jumped up and yelled "I'm Cured!"

He came to the man with the huge hump, the son of god then laid his hand upon the protuberence and it disappeared

finally, Jesus approached the construction worker the hard hat then jumped out from his seat and cried "don't touch me; im on disability."

rofl rofl xd sweatdrop xd lol rofl

this is sooo ******** hilarious my friend Johnny sent me this so I thought that I would share it.


if You have ever have some of those Jehova Witness or Mormon people show up at your doorstep passing out comic books and wanting to talk about God at 9am on a saturday morning? Here's how to get rid of these people for good, note that this method has been tried, tested, and is therefore true: Invite them in, serve some coffee minus the cake 'cause they don't deserve any treats, ask a bunch of idiotic questions to keep them talking, and then after the second cup of java or so get this insane look in your eyes and tell them you're a satanist who just drugged their coffee so you can drag them into the basement to perform a ritual on them in your super deluxe size sacrificial chamber. Never, and I mean never, will you see someone get up out of their chair and haul a** out of your
house so quickly, they'll leave so fast it's almost as if they vanished
into thin air, like their life skipped about thirty frames. they'll never bother you or come to your house ever again.

Date: Wed, 12 Feb 1997 08:01:27 +1000
Subject: could it happen here?

The following is a *true* story. It amused the hell out of me while it was
happening. I hope it isn't one of those "had to be there" things.

On my way home from the second job I've taken for the extra holiday ca$h I
need, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. In my billfold is a
$50 bill and a $2 bill. That is all of the cash I have on my person. I
figure that with a $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to
worry about people getting pissed at me.

ME: "Hi, I'd like one seven layer burrito please, to go."
IT: "Is that it?"
ME: "Yep."
IT: "That'll be $1.04, eat here?"
ME: "No, it's *to* *go*." [I hate effort duplication.]

At his point I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it
kind of funny and

IT: "Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back."

He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within earshot. The following
conversation occurs between the two of them.

IT: "Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?"
MG: "No. A what?"
IT: "A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me."
MG: "Ask for something else, THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A $2 BILL."
IT: "Yeah, thought so."

He comes back to me and says

IT: "We don't take these. Do you have anything else?"
ME: "Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?"
IT: "I don't know."
ME: "See here where it says legal tender?"
IT: "Yeah."
ME: "So, shouldn't you take it?"
IT: "Well, hang on a sec."

He goes back to his manager who is watching me like I'm going to shoplift,
and

IT: "He says I have to take it."
MG: "Doesn't he have anything else?"
IT: "Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change."
MG: "I'M NOT OPENING THE SAFE WITH HIM IN HERE." [my emphasis]
IT: "What should I do?"
MG: "Tell him to come back later when he has REAL money."
IT: "I can't tell him that, you tell him."
MG: "Just tell him."
IT: "No way, this is weird, I'm going in back."

The manager approaches me and says

MG: "Sorry, we don't take big bills this time of night." [it was 8pm
and this particular Taco Bell is in a well lighted indoor mall
with 100 other stores.]
ME: "Well, here's a two."
MG: "We don't take *those* either."
ME: "Why the hell not?"
MG: "I think you *know* why."
ME: "No really, tell me, why?"
MG: "Please leave before I call mall security."
ME: "Excuse me?"
MG: "Please leave before I call mall security."
ME: "What the hell for?"
MG: "Please, sir."
ME: "Uh, go ahead, call them."
MG: "Would you please just leave?"
ME: "No."
MG: "Fine, have it your way then."
ME: "No, that's Burger King, isn't it?"

At this point he BACKS away from me and calls mall security on the phone
around the corner. I have two people STARING at me from the dining area,
and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect. A few minutes later this
45 year oldish guy comes in and says [at the other end of counter, in a
whisper]

SG: "Yeah, Mike, what's up?"
MG: "This guy is trying to give me some [pause] funny money."
SG: "Really? What?"
MG: "Get this, a *two* dollar bill."
SG: "Why would a guy fake a $2 bill?" [incredulous]
MG: "I don't know? He's kinda weird. Says the only other thing he has is a
fifty."
SG: "So, the fifty's fake?"
MG: "NO, the $2 is."
SG: "Why would he fake a $2 bill?"
MG: "I don't know. Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?"
SG: "Yeah..."

Security guard walks over to me and says

SG: "Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use."
ME: "Uh, no."
SG: "Lemme see 'em."
ME: "Why?"
SG: "Do you want me to get the cops in here?"

At this point I was ready to say, "SURE, PLEASE," but I wanted to eat, so
I said

ME: "I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this $2 bill."

I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I was taking a swing
at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and
says

SG: "Mike, what's wrong with this bill?"
MG: "It's fake."
SG: "It doesn't look fake to me."
MG: "But it's a **$2** bill."
SG: "Yeah?"
MG: "Well, there's no such thing, is there?"

The security guard and I both looked at him like he was an idiot, and it
dawned on the guy that he had no clue.

My burrito was free and he threw in a small drink and those cinnamon
things, too. Makes me want to get a whole stack of $2 bills just to see
what happens when I try to buy stuff. If I got the right group of people,
I could probably end up in jail. At least you get free food.