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 Posted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:40 pm
Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
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Posted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:41 pm
You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can't fool Mom
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Posted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:42 pm
A real friend isn't the one bailing you out of jail. They're the ones sitting next to you saying, 'Man that was cool!
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Posted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:43 pm
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
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Posted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:47 pm
Strangers have the best candy
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Posted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:48 pm
Did you know that cigarette smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics
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Posted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:49 pm
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
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Posted: Sat Jan 24, 2009 11:58 pm
i smile cause i have no idea wats going on
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2009 12:00 am
when i stop smiling, you start running
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2009 12:02 am
having a white carpet wen u have kids, is like shouveling the snow off your path whilst its still snowing
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2009 12:05 am
this is you pilot speaking we must remind you that this is a non smoking flight, although if you do want a crarfty smoke, please join us in the cockpit where we have opend a window
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2009 12:06 am
tresspassers will be shot survivors will be shot again
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2009 12:09 am
why do doctors call what they do practice??
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Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2009 12:13 am
remeber there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, just pray its not a ******** train
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