Haru Mania
I saw it in the dictionary last night.. but can't remember what it means...
what does Wangle mean?
The word wangle was invented by none other than our own Thaddeus many years ago during one of the first incarnations of "Saturday Gaming," that tradition that would later become golden.
It happened in Geek Mecca, former home of the illustrious Super Johnson Bros, Mark and Eric. Those of you who don't game with them may know them as drummer and keyboardist for Shudder.
We were playing Smash Bros. Mark, Eric, myself, Thad, and Richard were there. This was original Smash Bros, mind you... for this story takes place
Back In The Day.
The place was Hyrule Castle, and the other competitors were KO'd, leaving just Thad and myself with one life each, his Link matching my Mario blow for blow. Our matches were often very close like this in those days, knowing each other so well, and one-on-one's between Thad and I were almost as fun to watch as to participate in, because of their intensity, and frequency of down to the wire, last minute action.
Thad had me at disadvantage and was sure to claim a hard fought victory over me, the tension building and building, everyone in the room ooing and ouching with every hit and dodge. When the tension reached it's breaking point, I rallied at the last moment and socked him with a glorius smash attack sending Link sailing offscreen in what was (obviously) one of the most memorable Smash matches we've played to this day.
In that very instant that my attack connected and Thad knew he was finished, he cried out in a voice I was sure would shake the foundations of the earth:
scream AaaaaWWWWW
WWWWW SHITWANGLES!!! scream ...
The rest of the room:
eek Whhhaaaaaaat??!
Since then we have learned what wangling truly is. It cannot be explained. You have to see it for yourself. But in as best as I can muster, wangling is the act of using your hands or fingers to... jitter around something in a disorienting and chaotic fashion.
Classic Smash Bros. insults sprang from this: a shitwangler, for example, is someone who wangles s**t. Many's the occasion Thad has called me a ********... but I hold no grudge, knowing that he is, in fact, a momwangler.
It was only fitting I suppose, that years later, with the release and our subsequent mastery of Super Smash Bros. Melee... the greatest multiplayer videogame in the universe... that we learned the the gods of gaming had seen Thad's wisdom. One of the game's bosses, the infamous Crazy Hand, fights with a frightening repertoire of moves... including a devestating Wangle Attack.
Until you can see a wangle firsthand, that description will have to suffice. Know the wangle... respect it, and if you fail to do so... fear it.
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eek eek I think I just wrote a PSA on Wangling.
crying I'ma go... place...
*leaves*