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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 7:02 am
podeman i think cows are monsters. i mean its this huge mass of flesh... and if you look at one it will look back, staring into the depths of your soul and it will chew at you! chew i tells ya. so i guess what im trying to say is, should we avoid flavored beef? only if you don't like the wonderful taste of beef... Cows are way too dumb to be monsters, it's cool.
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 8:48 am
Phil Srobeighn Who needs nukes when we have Archmage? Seriously, he comes in, fries the sucker after it tears the girl's clothes off, and we get dinner and a show. twisted You're goddamn right! Truest words ever spoken by a penguin.
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 1:01 pm
New question...
Is eating tentacles sooo wrong? And also...
Where does all that money go when we donate to the guild?
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 3:40 pm
Loktera New question... Is eating tentacles sooo wrong? And also... Where does all that money go when we donate to the guild? no I do not think eating tentacles are wrong at all
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 6:27 pm
vampiric_feline no I do not think eating tentacles are wrong at all I know! They are quite tasty... Especially with Teriyaki sauce.
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 6:51 pm
While the apparent reason that it is wrong is the old fashioned concept that [man+woman=natural, all other combinations=unnatural] there are various reasons that have actual value to them. 1. Tentacle beasts basically spend their time roaming about looking for any woman they can find. The rest of their time is spent- well, if you don't know about that I won't go into details but every time you eat a tentacle you're eating the juices of every girl that tentacle has had it's way with. That sounds kind of appealing but in this day and age we have alot of nasty virusses that can make their way into your system if you give them direct contact with a moist membraneous surface. (Most of the fighting proper just say that you don't know where that's been with the traditional sense in mind.) 2. That's a monster. You shouldn't eat that. You can make it into armor or maybe some snazzy clothing if it's colorful but don't eat it. Just skip to the collored text if you are familiar with oceanic mercury poisonning or don't care to read about it. *Background info* I'm sure that we all know about the origins of monsters (but if not shame on you, go sit in the corner and read the book of Jared to educate yourself,) and as such they are evil. [/background-info] Now, this may not make sense to everyone so I will relate an environmental issue to it. [hippyconcerns=on]After all of the years we have dumped our wastes into the ocean there has come to be a noticable ammount of mercury in it. As things are the mercury in the water wouldn't cause much harm to a person but an interesting thing happens to the fish. Most food-chains in the ocean have those tiny little water-organisms that grow and reproduce very quickly at the bottom. A fish need to eat about it's half it's body wieght of whatever it eats every so often to stay alive (This part is where the point is) but because many fish eat those fish and big fish like tuna eat the fish I was just talking about the mercury really builds up at the tops of the chains. If we didn't eat these fish only hippies would have reason for concern but we DO eat them and now we are practically eating rectal thermometers along with our fish every time we eat fish. That's just disgusting. [/hippyconcerns] So if you continue to eat the tentacles the terrible evil will build up until it dominates your personality and then you WILL be one of the types of monsters we have to kill. (This even applies to humans.) So while eating something weak like a slime won't have much affect* eating the more powerful monsters is a major no-no. *I do not condone the consumption of slimes even though dead slimes are nearly indistinguishable from jello if cut into a cube. 3. It's a monster. Only the professionals can really be sure that it's dead. Do you want to just invite it in to wreak havok on your stomach and maybe other organs? NOW do you understand?
To Fighting Proper: If I left out any major issues with monster consumption please let me know.
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 10:10 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2005 10:52 pm
Shokushu To Fighting Proper: If I left out any major issues with monster consumption please let me know. "You are what you eat" takes on new meanings when dining on monsters. Really.
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AstralSamurai Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 7:25 am
Loktera New question... Is eating tentacles sooo wrong? And also... Where does all that money go when we donate to the guild? gonk Well... I guess... technically there's nothing wrong with it per se... I mean, you are eating a monster, which is killing the monster, which can't be bad... but ummm... eww. sweatdrop
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Posted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:48 am
Archmage gonk Well... I guess... technically there's nothing wrong with it per se... I mean, you are eating a monster, which is killing the monster, which can't be bad... but ummm... eww. sweatdrop ... You missed the memo, didn't you? stare
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AstralSamurai Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 11:00 am
I felt it was important to clarify the question with not just one reason in minimal detail but a handful of them, elaborated to the point that the ignorant masses would so "Oh, now I get it. I should stop doing that." AstralSamurai Shokushu To Fighting Proper: If I left out any major issues with monster consumption please let me know. "You are what you eat" takes on new meanings when dining on monsters. Really. But I did cover that. "So if you continue to eat the tentacles the terrible evil will build up until it dominates your personality and then you WILL be one of the types of monsters we have to kill."AstralSamurai Archmage gonk Well... I guess... technically there's nothing wrong with it per se... I mean, you are eating a monster, which is killing the monster, which can't be bad... but ummm... eww. sweatdrop ... You missed the memo, didn't you? stare And also skipped over that whole thing I wrote. crying
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Posted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 12:56 pm
AstralSamurai ... You missed the memo, didn't you? stare gonk s**t... another one? I need a secretary or something. sweatdrop
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AstralSamurai Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 3:40 pm
Archmage gonk s**t... another one? I need a secretary or something. sweatdrop Well this Memo is only... Oh... 6000 or so years old. I can see why you'd forget about it. rolleyes
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Posted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 4:18 pm
Shokushu But I did cover that. "So if you continue to eat the tentacles the terrible evil will build up until it dominates your personality and then you WILL be one of the types of monsters we have to kill."The Book of Jared It was after the fifth month of my journey across that calm and pleasant sea they do call "The Mediterranean" that I realized that I had not partaken of sweetmeats since before I set sail on mine grand adventure. I resolved myself that, though I was not hungry, a Monster Slayer should never go without food for lack of effort. So saying, I seized mine spear and drove the Trireme upon the nearest island, on which I rapidly disembarked. I expected for it to take me some time to find the vulnerable flesh of monsterkin, but I was fortunate, for before those days of heroes and legends such as mineself, monsters were as numerous on the islands of that sea as fleas on the backside of trailer trash. Forsooth, I found mineself face to face with one of those fell beasts who name themselves avatars of Anubis, but are not of his blood. Instead, these gross perversions of Noble Anubis' blood sprouted, like all monsters, from the seed of Satan. To be fair, the battle lasted not long at all, for khopesh has no reach where a spear is concerned, and indeed though the "Slipping Sands" ability of their kind is remarkable, a Slayer of Monsters will have little difficulty with the evasive techniques of Satan Spawn. Once slain, I quickly diced my fallen foe into delicious bite-sized chunks before setting them inside my upturned hoplon with several cups of oil and frying it to a delicious brown. In soothe, thou shouldst have been there to partake of such a delicacy. However, during the consumption of mine glorious deep-fried sand-creature, I began to feel somewhat... Insubstantial. I did not understand what strange fate had befallen me until I began to make my way back towards my boat. A branch attempted to strike my face. Laugh not, fiend, for indeed, lucky in war does not mean lucky in all other things. Need I remind thee that the Great Ghengis Khan died not in battle, but because he fell off his horse? Or that Atilla the Merciless died not in battle, but of a nosebleed? Terrible fates await those who are great. However, fortunate was I this day, for when the branch swung at my face, my body didst verily evaporate into sand in the manner of evasion wielded by those agents of the Dark Lord whom I had just evicerated. Indeed, by the very act of eating the accursed beast, I had absorbed some of the dark creature's power. I realized then, that the consumption of monsterkin must be heavily regulated and done only in the most direst of emergencies. For what would become of a soul who partook of the Tentacled Flesh? Or ate of the Shadowmen? What terrible fate would befall the man who dined on the platypus?
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AstralSamurai Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 5:45 pm
Archmage I need a secretary or something. dibs! *cllicks pen and chews gum*
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