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Does anyone know who I am?
  Yeah. And I hate you. Die.
  No. But I don't care.
  Oh, yeah! You're that guy who dry-humped Lee's leg!
  I think I know you...
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Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker

PostPosted: Sat May 28, 2005 4:45 am


PhoenixSenshi
sai-bozu
...i see no one even took that bait...what do I need to do to get people in here? Damn, this is boring....


give out pocky? ^_^

....worth a shot....
*hands her pocky* Here you go.
PostPosted: Sat May 28, 2005 4:46 am


jkub
yeah pocky, that'll work for me

*hands* Here you go.

Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker


PhoenixSenshi

PostPosted: Sat May 28, 2005 12:50 pm


yay pocky! ^_^ um... so I'm here now. sup?
PostPosted: Mon May 30, 2005 11:29 am


yay! now what?

EmpyreanEcho


Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker

PostPosted: Sat Jul 02, 2005 8:36 am


BLAH!
Okay, sorry for the lack of updates, but I've been busy I didn't have anything to say.
Okay, so, I'm in summer school, in Stafford, living with my mom, which sucks. We haven't stopped fighting since I got back. Right now I'm with my dad, taking all time off of school to spend with him over here. Summer school sucks, I sleep all day and get an A. ******** UP.
I'm making this list of bands I like, and I'm going to post it in the Musically Inclined thread.
PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2005 6:33 pm


*twitches*......my....mother....just...I don't wanna talk aobut it, but...
....I'm seriously...seriously...considering these options. No joke:
1) Resort to final, violent (non-lethal, just physical) means to keep my mother out of my life
2) Sue my parents (I'm against pressing charges, I think its bogus) for everything (damag-wise) they've ever done to me and my stuff
3) Plain and simply, RUN AWAY
4) Leave to my dad's and never, ever come back
5) LAST RESORT: Start doing gang stuff or drugs or something to teach her just what it means to REALLY have a "punk rock", or, as my friends say, "gay mod" for a child.

I jsut keep on remembering...we used to be so happy. We would watch Pretty in Pink together, Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, Holy Grail, Are you being served?, everything, she would let me come to her work, we would do everything together...I even took up English because my dad told me she was an English major, and I wanted to be like her...now, its just like, things can't get much worse than this...I've tried just about everything, I've tried talking to her, diong things we used to do, quoting the movies we used to watch, helping out with the house, I agreed to come back here for schoolin, I tried as hard as I could, but I guess, socially, I'm a retarded ******** with as much hope of making amends with ANYONE as Will Smith ever making a good song ever again. My chances, for example, of patching things up over in cville are totalled, and I have no idea why; my old friends hate me, because I told them that they were hazardous to my pyschological state of mind and brought violence with them; I can't express myself without being either really prissy and book-sounding or really rude and street-ratish; and my mother and I will never be friends again.
Any thoughts on this? I really need to hear something, I'm at a loss. My will, for a first in ages, is shattered.
Another thing. I've been asking myself this, seriously, for ages now. I can't figure out why, but I keep asking it. Just, exactly why? Why am I here? Do I have a purpose? I mean, no one ever tries to truly help me, I don't care, but when I help myself, I jsut end up hurting people, so my happiness causes other people pain. Lots and lots of pain. I don't get it. If I'm here to cause pain, then please, please kill me now. I don't want that, I don't know many people who would, but it seems as if either I get hurt or someone else does. I can't put my finger on it, but it really seems to be the in-all-goodness truth. I've hurt you guys, my old friends, anyone I've ever met, I'm a lying b*****d, I'm rude, somewhat perverted, have trouble making friends, and the only thing I have going for me is that I'm no hypocrate, and I HATE hypocracy in every way, shape or form. Not to be confused with another thing I am, contradictory, which I do all the time and catch myself only after damage has been done. So, if all of these things is true, what is my purpose? I mean, I exist, that is enough to promise my right to happiness, but how can I make other people happy? I don't want to go into the church, I'm not pure enough to do stuff like that, and because of my ADHD, I never will be. It seems to be like I was made to impact people, and make them stronger by being a bad person. I honestly think that, I mean, hurting people appears to be what I'm best at, you guys know that. No sarcasm, I'm serious. So, why am I here? Am I going to save a life? Fight an evil? Stand up for truth? Do something like that? Or is my purpose to fall, to collapse under pressure and continue to be weak, as weak as all can ever be? Is my meaning that of those who fall to the lowest depths of flame, or am I destined for true greatness and the most perpetual of immortalities?
I really want to know what people think about this. Please, please tell me.

Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker


EmpyreanEcho

PostPosted: Wed Jul 06, 2005 8:22 pm


All bad choices, but not doing anything might be pretty bad too. If you need to pick one, pick number four. I have some serious problems with my mom. They're most of the reason I left Centreville. I left her there. I'm doing pretty well here. Our relationship hasn't had a miraculous recovery, but it's not as bad as it used to be. Your five choices are bad, you've got others, but if you pick one of them, pick four. It would probably be the best in the long run.
If you're questioning why you're on this Earth. You see no purpose for yourself, try starting something that helps others directly. Help out at a soup kitchen or a homeless shelter. Teach something or tutor someone. Find something to do that helps someone. Look at your life and figure out what you already do to help people. Help that person on the street who just dropped their stuff. Support your friends in what they do. Go see them at that concert or play. Anything to help someone else.
If you can't do any of the stuff you used to do with your mom, try something new. Don't ever give up on your relationship with her or any of your other family. Sometimes they make it seem impossible, but keep trying anyway. Maybe you need to distance yourself somehow. Or get closer.
Live life for itself. If you've got a life don't give it up. Share it with others, but keep what's yours. Don't let anyone take you life from you. Live life for what it will be, for what it could be. Set yourself a course to what you want. Remember that waters ore often rough and your course won't stay the same. Always keep the destination that you want though. No matter what, don't let go of your life or your dreams.
Make a purpose for yourself. If you can't see one, maybe you need to make one. I sometimes think our whole race is an experiment. Maybe there's a god that's decided to torture an entire species in order to find something out that it can't figure out on it's own. If such a god exists, the ability to create us had to have a great deal of prerequisite knowledge and if that god couldn't figure it out, it'll be pretty hard for even the entirety of Mankind to figure out.
And man, I've learned to get up and take a break anytime I see you post a lot, cuz I know I've got a lot of reading to do. I do read it all though. Maybe I wasn't a friend in Centreville, but I'll help you if I can. Besides, you're one of the most interesting guys I know.
PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2005 6:26 pm


....thanks a ton....
...I've started trying to do the one thing I'm REALLY good at, and that is share the stories of my life. Like, in the love live thread and stuff...but I'm doing it with people I know have troubles with their boyfriends or stuff...I'm also going to New York this weekend to help out in a rally to raise money for the london bombings. It wasn't as big as New York, but since Britain has almost no military, I find it to be a much more open protest against the ideals of freedom, both of government, and of religious consent, which I believe are the main reasons some (well, okay, most) people in the Middle East hate Western Civilization, because we're so open to new ideas.
Anyway, I'm going with my father...my mom doesn't care about London at all, which ticks me off, because she knows I have friends there that I haven't heard from...like this girl named Alycia who I was eyeing back in Centreville, she moved there...anyway, thanks, j.

Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker


EmpyreanEcho

PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2005 8:36 pm


This is gonna sound weird, but I kinda wish the American Revolution hadn't happened when it did...One reason, slavery would likely have been abolished sooner. Many others, but I'm too tired to remember all of them.
PostPosted: Wed Jul 13, 2005 2:58 pm


......Wow, that was both random AND a fair statement.....
....anyway, I've just gotten back from New York, and I must say, it wasn't what I had expected. was residing in the Milford Plaza, and though I was able to help out and print out and hand out a bunch of fliers and such, they didn't give me much to do, so I basically walked aimlessly around Time Square for a day. I went to the Virgin Music store, FYE, Boarders, Barnes and Noble, I was in the Soho fashion district, China town (which wasn't very chinese), and I was having a heated debate with a few of my workers over who was cooler, Freddy Mercury, or Fonzie.
So, for right now, i want that to be the topic. Who was cooler? FM, the lead singer of Queen, or just plain FF, the wise-a**, suave, sexy teenage rebel on Happy Days?

Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker


EmpyreanEcho

PostPosted: Wed Jul 13, 2005 8:56 pm


Fonzie
PostPosted: Thu Jul 14, 2005 12:33 am


Mercury.

Quixotic Virtuoso


Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker

PostPosted: Thu Jul 14, 2005 1:40 pm


Hmmm....I'm voting Freddy for person I think is most cool, but Fonzie for "one of the two i would most sleep with", since, you know, Freddy's dead, and I'm not into men THAT old.
Realistically, I can't decide. So, right now, its a tie!
PostPosted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 5:45 pm


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *bursts into real tears* ITS JUST NOT FAIR! WHY DO THE GIRLS GET TO HAVE ALL THIS NEAT EGL s**t AND WE DUDES DON'T?! WHY, GOD, WHY? I AM THE ONLY PERSON HERE WHO ACTUALLY WEARS THE DAMN DRESSES, WHY CAN'T I GET SOME FOR MY GUY? *pisses on like some ******** child* WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker


Onmyouza-tou

Clean Smoker

PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 4:59 pm


Okay, I was sorta gonna boycot gaia for not giving the guys jrocker s**t, but now I'm too hyper and faaaaaaaar to medicated for that s**t. Hahaha! Yeah, man, so right now, I'm gonna let you babies here about the dead! With a few minor touches from me!

This is a story of one of my friends. You see, one of her very close friends died a while ago. Like, oh, maybe a year or so. A few weeks after her death, my friend and a few other friends of hers got together and held this se-ance, Seounce, you know, that dead thing, just to see if they could get a hold of her. The didn't hold it properly, they didn't follow the rules, and instead, they held a Ouiji-thing instead of a calling. They messed that up a tad, too, but you know, it was really wierd, cuz,
they actually called their friend. And man, was she pissed. Her friends let her drive home drunk late at night, and then she died. She ran into something...and she was angry at them for letting her do so. Naturally, the girls all freaked, and they stopped playing immediately. They crawld out of the attic where they were holding the event, and started to throw the thing out of mind. I mean, it could have just been them feeling guilty.
They put it out of thought, and throughout the night, they sang, and drank, and had an all-round good time. They seemed to keep getting crank calls though, and it was really starting to get on their nerves. How dare they keep on calling them like this? They got something to say, say it.
Well, they didn't mean it like that, not by killing someone and making every phone in the house, including all the cell phones, faxes, and pagers, ring at the same moment their fellow partier hit the ground, lifeless. No pulse, no sign of warning. And then, from the upstairs rooms, they could hear the doors opening, closing, and opening again, and from each creak of the hinge came a hollowed whisper, one that seemed to breath into them all lightly, a barely, barely, recognizable "Here I am, I am Here." Even though there was not a living soul above the first floor, they could hear the light footsteps across the squeaky floorboards slowing creeping towards the wooden stairs. At that moment, from the absolute terror, my friend screamed "Margie, Margie STOP IT!"
Marge simply wailed as loud as she could from the top of the stair well, and jumped down, landing through the first floor, and out of the house. They never found out where she went, or what had happened to Ian, the boy who died, but they do know one thing: Margarette Harper's body was taken from her grave that day, and left in her coffin was a small note, engraved with Marge's blood. It read:
"I have taken the one I loved, and he shall be with me forever, like he promised."


I will stop there, and I would get into more detail, but I fear that I must sign off! Bai bi!
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