Xiraes
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- Posted: Sun, 13 May 2007 15:24:07 +0000
It's...
For those of you who may not know the Anti-Guide, it is writer's thread that seeks to poke fun of clichés through sheer sarcasm and wit. Even if you’re not a writer yourself, I’m sure you’ll get a laugh out of it, so visit!
But onto this thread. The point of this round robin is to write a terrible, terrible story.
It can be terrible in any number of ways, which include, but are not limited to: cliché plots, cliché characters, bad grammar, overly simple writing, overly ornate writing, and chatspeak stories. Don’t be afraid to do whatever you want with the story: change style! Kill some characters! Put them in an entirely different setting and spill the plot’s guts on the floor! Just as long as it’s bad.
You do not have to post or be a regular in the Anti-Guide to post here, but I’d suggest you visit, since it’s a really fun thread. And before I go on, special thanks to Alea Facta Est for starting the threat, and [One.Life] and Rid V for giving good bad good suggestions.
wahmbulance A few quick rules before we carry on:
1. Obviously, obey all Gaia TOS. PG-13 and all that, you should really know this
2. Make the story bad
3. Make the story funny
4. Be creative
5. Take the rules lightly
Without further ado, here is the first segment:
Aannee Mari Suu Penelope Alanathia Kyraenia Xena Jifajlk Johnson was an ordinary sixteen year old. Well, if by ordinary you mean a half-human, half-elf, half-vampire vampire/demon slayer! (Author’s Note: Aren’t I clever?). Most people called her Kyra, short for Kyraenia, the most mystical sounding of all her names. Kyra was really beautiful. Really. She was really thin, like, 110 pounds! And really tall too, like, 6 ft! And muscular too, but not so muscular as to make her unattractive and un-feminine. She had luscious golden locks that went down to her a** (AN: Hee hee. a**), and her eyes were like sapphires in the moonlight, or maybe a deep ocean blue that sparkled in the sun. People used metaphors a lot with her. Her measurements were precisely 36” (D that is), 22”, 30”.
Kyra’s parents had died when she was very little at the hands of a vampire-demon, which was why she was a vampire/demon slayer. Her stepparents, unfortunately, were abusive, going so far as to give Kyra a 10 o’clock curfew, and demanding good grades. Which she got, since Kyra was very smart. So smart, that she hadn’t needed any training whatsoever to become a vampire/demon slayer.
At her high school, Kyra was an outcast, which had nothing whatsoever to do with her whiny, self-righteous attitude and immaturity. No, it was because all sociable, pink-wearing girls bitches. (AN: Like this girl in my class who is so mean to me and she thinks she’s so special but she’s not and uggh I just can’t stand her anyway…)
Kyra was sitting in her room, when suddenly, her cell phone rang…
The Anti-Guide Round Robin
For those of you who may not know the Anti-Guide, it is writer's thread that seeks to poke fun of clichés through sheer sarcasm and wit. Even if you’re not a writer yourself, I’m sure you’ll get a laugh out of it, so visit!
But onto this thread. The point of this round robin is to write a terrible, terrible story.
It can be terrible in any number of ways, which include, but are not limited to: cliché plots, cliché characters, bad grammar, overly simple writing, overly ornate writing, and chatspeak stories. Don’t be afraid to do whatever you want with the story: change style! Kill some characters! Put them in an entirely different setting and spill the plot’s guts on the floor! Just as long as it’s bad.
You do not have to post or be a regular in the Anti-Guide to post here, but I’d suggest you visit, since it’s a really fun thread. And before I go on, special thanks to Alea Facta Est for starting the threat, and [One.Life] and Rid V for giving good bad good suggestions.
wahmbulance A few quick rules before we carry on:
1. Obviously, obey all Gaia TOS. PG-13 and all that, you should really know this
2. Make the story bad
3. Make the story funny
4. Be creative
5. Take the rules lightly
Without further ado, here is the first segment:
Aannee Mari Suu Penelope Alanathia Kyraenia Xena Jifajlk Johnson was an ordinary sixteen year old. Well, if by ordinary you mean a half-human, half-elf, half-vampire vampire/demon slayer! (Author’s Note: Aren’t I clever?). Most people called her Kyra, short for Kyraenia, the most mystical sounding of all her names. Kyra was really beautiful. Really. She was really thin, like, 110 pounds! And really tall too, like, 6 ft! And muscular too, but not so muscular as to make her unattractive and un-feminine. She had luscious golden locks that went down to her a** (AN: Hee hee. a**), and her eyes were like sapphires in the moonlight, or maybe a deep ocean blue that sparkled in the sun. People used metaphors a lot with her. Her measurements were precisely 36” (D that is), 22”, 30”.
Kyra’s parents had died when she was very little at the hands of a vampire-demon, which was why she was a vampire/demon slayer. Her stepparents, unfortunately, were abusive, going so far as to give Kyra a 10 o’clock curfew, and demanding good grades. Which she got, since Kyra was very smart. So smart, that she hadn’t needed any training whatsoever to become a vampire/demon slayer.
At her high school, Kyra was an outcast, which had nothing whatsoever to do with her whiny, self-righteous attitude and immaturity. No, it was because all sociable, pink-wearing girls bitches. (AN: Like this girl in my class who is so mean to me and she thinks she’s so special but she’s not and uggh I just can’t stand her anyway…)
Kyra was sitting in her room, when suddenly, her cell phone rang…
